Abandonment
by ssjx7squall
Summary: Shiznat AU. Natsuki and shizuru are torn apart by personal matters while Sears and another company that has come to fill First Districts void move behind the scenes. Action Drama and Suspense and of course SHIZNAT IMPORTANT NOTICE
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Well this is my first fan fic and in all actuality my first writing i have ever put up for public review/view. Please tell me what you think and i guess depending on how well its received will determine how quickly i come out with a second part. This is meant to be a series and a pretty lengthy one i think lol. Its gonna be mostly action based with heavy emphasis on these two characters obviously /. I guess ill give more notes on the next one, till then enjoy and let me know what you think.

The Usual Disclaimers apply: i dont own the characters or the world blah blah dont sue me and all that

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Abandonment

God damn it Shizuru, thought Natsuki has she sped down the wet rode going a great deal faster than she knew she should. It was midnight and pouring as the biker tore through the streets seemingly oblivious to the dangers she faced in going so fast in the foul weather.

Why the hell did she go without telling me? I thought we were friends damn it. You're not going to get away that easy, thought Natsuki as she came upon an intersection. The light suddenly turned red and she slammed on the breaks knowing she would end up in the middle of the intersection even if she did come to a stop. There was a semi-truck crossing the intersection and she knew shed be dead if she hit it so at the last second she turned her bike on its side using the momentum to carry her and it forward. She skidded right underneath the giant trailer narrowly missing the rear tires. She smiled knowing she had just barely lived until the bike tilted up and sent her flying.

She landed about ten feet away from the bike with a hard crunch on the ground and kept bouncing until she hit a curb. She gasped as all the air was painfully ripped from her lungs. Her vision blurred as she remembered how she ended up here.

It was a month after the Carnival and Natsuki couldn't be happier. She had gone through some pretty drastic changes in the past month, she was actually showing up to school, she did her homework, and for the first time in her life she had friends. It was an odd development, one that she herself didn't fully understand but she found herself comfortable around other people for the first time in her life.

She would eat lunch with Mai and Mikoto just about every day, laughing at Mikoto's animalistic and childlike antics. She would even go with them on their frequent visits to karaoke in which Mai dragged the entire Ranger squad along with them. The first time Natsuki laughed at one something Nao said, without immediately being followed by an insult there was dead silence in the room. This of course brought on the insult but the fact that it wasn't there to begin with was something of a precedent.

By far the biggest change was her relationship with Shizuru. They spent almost every day together. When Shizuru was taking care of her president activities, Natsuki was usually quietly sitting in the corner working on her homework. After school they would usually head to Shizuru's dorm so she could help Natsuki with her homework. Afterwards they would usually get something to eat spending most of the evening together talking, laughing, and just plain enjoying each others company.

Her change had not gone unnoticed. One day while they were eating lunch and Mikoto had just run headfirst into a tree causing Natsuki to burst out laughing Mai smiled and said, "You've changed Natsuki."

This cut off Natsuki's laughter who then turned to Mai with narrowed eyes and asked, "What do you mean?"

"Before a few weeks ago I had never really heard you laugh. You never ate lunch with us or actually volunteered yourself to go to karaoke with us. You don't even fight with Nao like you used to. You seem like a much happier person," Mai smiled as her friend blushed slightly.

"I don't think I've changed that much…" Natsuki began looking at her sandwich in her hands. "But, I do think I am happier." Thinking of Shizuru she smiled. She then remembered something suddenly.

Quickly putting her things away she stood up and said, "Sorry I just remember something." Before Mai could say another word she went sprinting towards the student council room. She couldn't believe she almost forgot about tomorrow. She reached the student council room and knocked on the door. She stopped for a minute, that's never something she would have done before; her usual habit was to just walk in like she belonged there. She ground her teeth at this, maybe Mai was right, maybe she had changed.

There was a brief silence and then came a response in the soft Kyoto-ben voice she had come to enjoy hearing, "Come in."

Natsuki opened the door and stepped in. There behind the desk as always was Shizuru sipping her tea, while reading some papers on her desk. Natsuki smiled then blushed at how she suddenly felt slightly giddy that Shizuru was there. Why did she feel that way? Shizuru was always there, and when she wasn't she would always come if Natsuki waited.

She was pulled from her thoughts when the Kyoto woman said, "Ara, is just seeing me enough to make Natsuki blush? I guess I shouldn't teas you too much today or you might feint." Natsuki clenched her fists and buried her head in her shoulders; her face turning even redder if that was possible. Shizuru just laughed quietly behind her hand.

Not wanting to call further attention to her embarrassment Natsuki quickly turned around. "Shut up, I just wanted to ask you something."

"Oh," said Shizuru standing, "and what does my Natsuki want of me." She giggled slightly at how Natsuki's shoulders tensed more and could only imagine how red the younger girl was now.

"Um…." Began Natsuki not really sure how to proceed. She turned around rubbing the back of her head looking at the ground, "I was uh, wondering if maybe uh, you would want to hang out some tomorrow? Maybe, I dunno a dinner or a movie or something like that."

If she hadn't been looking at the ground she would have seen the sad smile flash across Shizuru's face before it was quickly banished. "Ara, is Natsuki asking me out on a date?"

Natsuki's shoulders tensed again and her face was a bright red, "It's not a date! I was just wondering if you would want to do something."

It was then that she finally saw it. That sad smile. It was only there for a second, so short that she couldn't be sure if it was actually there or not but she knew. She knew because she had seen so many in the past month. Usually it was there when they were together and Shizuru thought Natsuki wasn't looking. It tore at her, and yet she didn't know what she could do about it. It was filled with so much pain and sadness that it pulled at her in ways she didn't understand. She knew she would have to find out why sooner or later but she had been trying to ignore them.

Shizuru's voice was low when she said, "Ara, don't be mad. Of course I would like to go with you tomorrow." She then smiled one of her genuine smiles. One of her smiles she reserved for Natsuki and Natsuki alone.

Natsuki blushed and looked at the ground again, "So uh, I'll meet you at the usual spot then?" She was fidgeting. Why the hell was she fidgeting? It wasn't like she hadn't asked Shizuru if she had wanted to do something before.

"Of course," smiled Shizuru.

"Well then, I'll see you after school, I'm gonna need help on some math, I got a big test tomorrow." And before Shizuru could say anything she had run out the door.

Shizuru sighed and shut the door. That Natsuki, how she could make her heart soar one moment and then tear at it the next all without knowing. She sat back down, taking a long drink from her tea, enjoying the burning sensation that helped her for get about her non physical pain. "This is for the best right?" she asked to no one in general. It's best for her, for me. She has friends now, and she is doing well in school, and she was so much happier now. In no time at all she would forget about her. This thought hurt her even more than anything else.

She opened the drawer of the desk and lifted out a few books. There, at the bottom of the drawer, safely pressed between two pieces of paper was the flower. The one that so long ago she had stopped Natsuki from crushing. She had watched it grow, enjoyed its beauty, and when the winter came to claim it, she plucked it for herself.

She sighed, knowing how hypocritical and selfish she was but she couldn't stand to see something that held a connection with her and Natsuki die a slow, withering death. It was then that she felt the tears streaming down her face. "Natsuki…" She put the flower in her laptop, closed it and stood. Wiping away the tears, she looked around the room for the last time, trying to burn in the images of all the times Natsuki and her had spent there into her memory for ever, then left, closing the door behind her.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I was amazed at the reviews i got, i honestly didnt expect any and if i did get some i honestly didnt think theyd be positive. i was so shocked i actually worried about writing the next chapter thinking id screw up but well, i hate leaving a story un finished so i took a shot at it anyways. Thanx for your reveiws, and keep em coming

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Chapter 2:

The rain seemed to increase its intensity as it poured down on the biker. Rain drops bounced and slid off the helmet but with its darkened visor, her still form gave no indication of whether or not she was still alive.

But she was alive, much to her own dismay. Natsuki groaned as she opened her eyes. _Where the hell am I?_ She stared across the asphalt watching the rain hit the street for a few moments before she remembered. _Oh that's right…I crashed. _She groaned again when she tried to rise. _Damn it, I must have cracked a few ribs_. She began to rise slowly, first raising her head, then tried to support her self with her left arm but it gave out on her and she fell back down, cursing again as pain racked her midsection. _Definatly cracked a few ribs. _

She turned over on her stomach and began to rise using mostly her left arm to push herself up, since she could barely move her right one. She managed to get to her knees before she winced again, something was wrong with her right leg and she was feeling lightheaded. Slowly beginning to stand she wiped away the water from her visor so she could view the damage. Her bike suit was ripped to shreds all along her right side, as was most of her skin, her right leg and hip taking most of the damage. Her right arm had been hyper extended when she hit the asphalt and her back was screaming in pain from where she had hit the curb. _I better not look too closely at it._ She thought just as her leg gave out on her, slamming her painfully back to the ground.

_Must….get…to…Shizuru… _She slowly rose again, this time making sure not to rely too much on her leg. Looking around for her bike, she saw it near by lying on its side in the middle of the street. _You better still run you piece of shit_. Limping toward the fallen bike, she only then realized how bad her leg was. _I won't last to long on this thing_. She could barely stand let alone walk. Each step sent pain shooting through her leg and hip. It didn't help that the ground was slick putting her in danger of slipping, or that raindrops kept falling in her wounds making her grimace each time they connected.

By the time she reached her bike she was gasping in pain,barely able to breathe, her chest and back throbbing._ This is the worst I've been in a while._ Standing still for a few moments looking down at her motorcycle, dreading what she had to do knowing how heavy the thing was.

Cursing she bent over to pick up the bike, pain ripping through her as she hauled it upright. _Why the hell does this shit keep happening to me_? She painfully mounted the bike and tested to see if the thing would start. Soon answered by the roar of the engine she couldn't help but smile, _well, at least my luck hasn't completely run out. _She looked down at her leg and winced, quickly looking away, she wasn't sure but she thought she saw white underneath all the red. _No time for that now._

She turned the bike around, and sped off into the night, hoping that too much time hadn't passed.

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It was a beautiful day, thought Natsuki as she walked towards the gardens. Many students stopped to stare at the girl, famous for her permanent scowl walked by with a huge grin on her face. She didn't even notice she was so much in her own little world or she would have told them to keep walking. Though with how she had been lately she probably would have just ignored it.

She felt unusually happy, almost giddy. _What the hell is wrong with me?_ she thought looking at her hands. They were shaking slightly. She couldn't control it, she tried to calm herself with a deep breath but it did nothing to still her rebel limbs. The shaking seemed to spread slowly out from her chest to different parts of her body but her arms were by far the worst. Tremors seemed to course through her every so often intensifying the shaking. _Am I this excited about seeing Shizuru today? It's not like I didn't see her last night. _Her smile faded a little.

Shizuru had seemed oddly down last night. More detached than she normally was, staring off into nothingness with a blank expression, not even wearing her trademark empty smile. She never wore the thing around Natsuki, especially when they were alone but anything would have been better than that blank expression, and those sad red eyes. Natsuki knew that even if she asked all she would get would be a smile (which she wanted anyways) and a dismissive response.

An especially strong tremor coursed through her snapping her back to reality. She looked around hoping no one noticed her shaking so much._ This is ridiculous._ _Maybe because its today….yeah, that has to be it._

After all today was a very important day. Today was the day that all those years ago she had met Shizuru. Her smile returned with the memory. It was then that she forced her way into my life, barging in like she belonged there. _Maybe she did? …...What am I thinking?_ _All I wanted to do was get rid of that damned flower…And I knew my reason was stupid and cliché, the damn thing reminded me of my self. Then there she was, stopping me from destroying myself. _She coughed at the thought. _God, Mai is right, I have changed, I'm becoming a moron._

But it was true she realized. Shizuru had always been there for her when she needed it. Even when she didn't, she smirked. She supported her when there was no one else, when even Natsuki had given up hope on her self. She was the one thing Natsuki could depend on. The one person she could always rely on to be there for her, to support her….to care for her.

This time, the thought came without any embarrassment and she smiled again. Yes, Shizuru would always be there for her.

_Except for right now…_ she thought looking around the garden with annoyance. _Oh well, I'm usually here first anyways; I hope she doesn't make me wait to long. _Sighing, she sat down on the ground underneath a nearby tree to wait.

Shizuru never came.

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_Damn it! Why am I crying? Why now!? _The tears were making it hard to see, never mind how hard it was already with the wet visor and dim light. _Why Shizuru!? _She emitted a low growl and she increased her speed. _I thought you'd never leave… I thought…_

Thunder crashed over head as lightning ripped across the sky, an omen of things to come. Natsuki merely increased her speed.

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A/N: So Natsuki isnt dead...lil early for her to be dying i think lol, just some warnings about future chapters, humer and the more realistic drama are not my strong points (there fore its ironic as hell that im doing one of these in which there will be alot of drama) but ill try anyways. Also if you guys have any suggestions id be happy to take them, one of my friends kinda trashed a few of my future story ideas so i have some pretty big holes to fill. And thanx to the same friend for helpin me reword some of this chapter. 


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This chapter was originally intended to be much longer and incompass really what the next chapter will, unfortunatly i got impatient and decided to post this as a chapter. While many of you are probably going wtf, im hoping the next chapter will clear up some things and if not ill explain it a bit. As always thanx for reading and please R&R if you wish

Disclaimer: Of course i dont own Mai hime or the characters.

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Chapter 3

Across town Shizuru was fighting desperately to stay asleep. Nightmares kept attacking her subconscious mind as she tried to find some amount of rest. She suddenly shot upright gasping for breath looking around in a panic. Something was horribly wrong. Looking at the clock on her bedside table she could see that it was 12:00. Groaning slightly she laid back down, staring at the red numbers that mocked her. She had fallen asleep twenty minutes ago.

_It must have been the thunder that woke me. That and the dreams…_ Sighing slightly, she rolled over and closed her eyes trying to find some semblance of sleep. _This is going to be a long night_. Unfortunately for her, every time Shizuru closed her eyes she saw _her_ face. _I am never going to get to sleep this way_. Sighing again, she threw back the covers, and stood stretching slightly, trying to fight back the small feeling of panic she felt in the center of her chest.

Avoiding the boxes that littered the floor of the nearly unfurnished apartment she made her way towards her new kitchen. Tea was what she needed, it always helped her calm down. Entering the kitchen, she began to look through the boxes on the counter searching for her tea pot and tea. She hadn't had time to unpack yet, because she had spent the entire day packing everything in her old apartment in order to get it here without anyone (or any one person) knowing she was leaving.

Pulling out a pot she filled it with water and set it on the stove and began heating it while she looked for her tea and cups. _I am pretty foolish, there is no way she would have tried to stop me. No, I know she would have._

She sighed again putting both her hands on the edge of the counter her head hanging down and her eyes closed. _Come on Shizuru, you can do this. You left because it was what was best for her. Right? It was best for her, or was it best for you?_ She shook her head._ She will be fine without me. She has friends now, she will even graduate on time. _Shizuru smiled slightly at the thought of Natsuki actually graduating, something that had seemed nearly impossible earlier that year or ever for that matter. _But, she doesn't need someone like me around her. I am what is keeping her from being truly happy, she can move on without me. Natsuki can forget about me._ All the strength in her legs began to give out and she slowly slid to the floor, shaking uncontrollably. _Natsuki can be happy now. She will be mad at me but…_ It was then she felt the tears streaming down her cheeks. _Why? Why did I have to feel this way?_

She put her hands on her face, trying to hold the tears that kept coming. "Why?" She said aloud. "Why did it have to be this way?"

_You know it had to be like this._ She answered herself. _She said she forgave you. She took pity on you and spent more time with you, all the while probably worrying you might do something to her._

Shizuru shuddered violently at this thought. _NO! I would never do anything like that to Natsuki again._ But even she didn't believe it. _All I want to do is hold her, to feel her close, to keep her safe and have her in my arms. That's all I want. That is all I need._

Her crying increased in intensity until and exceptionally loud crack of thunder pulled her from her thoughts. _No, I cannot do this. _She stood slowly, pulling herself up from the floor. She grabbed a nearby wash cloth and began to wipe the tears away from her face while pulling her cup out of a nearby box. She poured the tea into it, enjoying the heat radiating from the cup and inhaling the comforting aroma. This was her escape. The thing she felt the greatest love towards besides Natsuki. It was simple, comforting and always there for her. Even at the times when she thought she would collapse from the wars that ever raged in her heart, she could escape into the simple smell, taste and heat of her tea.

The tea quickly warmed her hands as she walked into the dining area and sat down at the plain round table sighing again as she sat down. The storm had picked up some since she had first woken up; thunder echoing through out the area every few seconds followed by lightning that lit up the night sky like it was day. Shizuru sat staring out the large window by her table watching the water run down the window and fall on the world outside. _What is this feeling in my chest? Something is wrong. _She scoffed at this. Of course something was wrong, but she could help but feel that something more immediate and important was trying to occupy her thoughts.

After an exceptionally bright flash of lightning she returned her vision to the apartment before her. It was a simple apartment nothing fancy, just a living room, kitchen, dining area, bedroom and bathroom. Very little had been furnished with the exception of the dining room set she was currently sitting at and the bed she had been sleeping in. _This is alright isn't it?_

Shaking her head slightly she began to stare into the depths of her cup, watching the steam slowly rise. _Why? This doesn't even work anymore_. Tears began to fall down her face again; she began to sob again quietly, alone in the dark while the storm raged outside.

_I need to try to get some sleep._ Fighting back the sobs that continued to force their way out of her she stood and made her way to the kitchen. _I am doing this for her right?_ She turned on the hot water in the sink and winced when her hands came into contact with the hot water but kept them there. She stared at the water as it washed over her hands losing her self in the burning sensation. _I'm not just running away?_

She stood there like that for a few moments before the heat became unbearable and she removed her hands. Cleaning her cup, she set it in a cabinet then slowely made her way to her bedroom. _Let's try this again._

Crawling under the covers of her bed she curled up, taking some comfort in the warmth of her bed. She stayed like that for a while before the tears came again. Hugging her knees and forcing her eyes shut she continued to cry. _Natsuki…_

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So there is chapter 3. I am trying to perfect the next scene really so it could be a while before it is posted but please stick with the story )

ssjx7squall


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Ok here it is finally, it took me forever to write this. This scene is really one that got me to write this thing in the first place (and it still turned out nothing like i thought it would) but anyways here it is. The reasons it took so long was alot of writers block, (if you ignore my other thing i wrote while drunk) in fact i wrote the chapter out once and completely trashed it afterwards. So here it is finally, its pretty angsty (using the lingo on the site) so theres that warning, again this is going to be going on for a while and ...well ill give that small spoiler at the end. I will say this tho, dont hate shizuru yet.

ssjx7squall

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Shizuru had just barely drifted off into a fitful sleep when a distinct banging began to resonate through out the apartment. The storm still raged outside, and if not for the brief breaks in thunder claps the banging would have been completely drowned out. The new sound found its way into Shizuru's bedroom and woke her with a start. She glanced around in a panic, not recognizing where she was for a few moments before calming down slowly. _Am I ever going to get to sleep tonight?_

She sighed and fell back down to the pillow behind her. It was damp and for a moment she wondered how it had gotten that way before she remembered that she had fallen asleep crying. It was only after a few moments of thought that she realized she had been sweating despite the cool temperature. Forcing her eyes shut she almost started to cry again when she heard it.

The sound of the loud banging that had woken her reached her ears again. _Ara, is someone here?_ Quickly glancing at her clock, she saw that it read 2:09. _Who might this be?_ She thought standing up slowly, wrapping her robe around her tightly to fight off the chill that had begun to affect her. The banging was rather violent, it was coming from her front door and it seemed that who ever was responsible was trying to break it down. _I can't think of anyone who knows I am here and would come at this time of…._ All of a sudden a thought struck her and releasing her grip on her robe she ran to the door, and without looking through the hole to see who it was she threw it open.

There stood a figure in silhouette, shadows hiding all features, with a fist raised to begin another round of beating on her door. It stood still in surprise for only a moment before it advanced upon her forcing her back into her dark apartment. The figure roared, "Shizuru!" just as her back met the wall behind her.

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The roar of her motorcycle was battling the roar of the storm as Natsuki pulled up to the apartment building. This had to be it, she didn't care if it wasn't, she was not going to leave until she found Shizuru. Shivering uncontrollably as she got off her now mangled Ducatti, she angrily threw her hair out of her face. Between her helmet fogging up, her tears and the rain water splashing on the visor she could stand it no longer and had thrown it off as soon as she had come to a stop outside the apartment complex.

Natsuki quickly limped towards the nearest building, ignoring the deep puddles that seemed to be everywhere. Coming upon the first door she quickly read the number and continued on. She passed half a dozen doors before she found the one she wanted. Anger coursed through her, it was the only thing keeping her standing, that and her desire to confront the source of that anger.

She began pounding on the door, ignoring the pain that jarred her body each time her fist connected with the door. Not really caring if she disturbed anyone else nearby she began to yell, almost scream, "Shizuru!"

After a few minutes of hitting the door with no response she doubled her efforts and began to kick it as well. She was going to confront the other girl if she had to break down the damned door. _I don't care if you don't want to see me anymore, your going to tell me why damn it!" _

Just as she was considering breaking the window next to the door she heard a small click and the door swung open.

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­Natsuki stood there and blinked for a moment before she realized the door was open. Her eyes focused upon the girl in front of her and rage overtook her. She aggressively charged the girl, driving her back into the dark room and only stopping when her back met the wall. Roaring her name as she forcefully put her hands on the wall over Shizuru's shoulders.

There was complete silence. The only sound that could be heard in the apartment was Natsuki's labored breathing and the sound of the storm through the open door. Light flooded the apartment as lightning flashed outside, followed shortly by a deafening crack of thunder. Natsuki's head was bowed down, her eyes closed and all muscles tense.

"Natsuki…"

"Why!?" Natsuki cried interrupting Shizuru, raising her head a fierce look in her eyes that the other girl could not see. "Why did you leave without telling me?!' Her voice was cracking but it held a dangerous tone that demanded an answer.

There was silence again except for the rain. Natsuki was staring intently at Shizuru, trying to focus her blurring vision on the girl in front of her, and squinting through the shadows that hid her face. She was fighting desperately to remain standing, her wounds finally taking their toll on her as the adrenaline was slowly fading.

Finally Shizuru responded in her ever slightly amused voice, "Ara, did Natsuki miss me already?"

Before she had any idea what she was doing, Natsuki's right fist was drawn back and she punched into the wall behind Shizuru. Her head lowered again and she began to shake violently. When she spoke, her voice was quiet and held the same dangerous tone as before. "Now is not the fucking time for that Shizuru!"

Shizuru was now staring wide eyed at the shaking girl. She had not flinched when she saw Natsuki's hand draw back but she was still shocked. Looking slightly to her left she saw that Natsuki's arm was in the wall up to about her forearm. She slowly looked back at the younger girl in front of her.

"Natsuki--"

"How could you leave me!" Natsuki was looking at Shizuru again. Her strength returned slightly at her outburst but it still hurt to breath. She closed her eyes again trying to fight what she knew was coming. _Please tell me, please I need to know. Was it something I did? I…I... Ah, WHY!!_ Tears were now streaming down Natsuki's face.

She was about to punch the wall again when she realized what she was doing. Suddenly scared she looked at her position and jumped back nearly collapsing when pain ripped through her right side.

Shizuru noticed this and cried, "Natsuki! What's wrong?" She took a stepped toward the other girl extending a hand.

Growling Natsuki glared back at Shizuru, "Answer my question damn it!" She was fighting to remain standing now, any minute now she was going to collapse, but she would have an answer first.

Lightning flashed again, showing a worried expression on Shizuru's face as she pulled her hand back. Thunder crashed immediately after as the room was once again cast into darkness. Once again there was silence in the room as the two girls stood only a few feet apart waiting for the other to make a move. Each second that passed by in silence fed Natsuki's anger, _Are you not going to tell me? _She clenched her fists, once again oblivious to her injuries. The flow of tears strengthened and she closed her eyes again trying to hold them back. _After all we've been through, how could you do this to me?_

She raised her head to look at Shizuru again; her head was down, as if staring at the carpet. _I am NOT leaving 'til I get an answer!_ Clenching her fists tighter, she was about to demand an answer again when Shizuru raised her head slowly. Lightning flashed outside again, giving a brief glimpse of the older girls face. An expressionless Shizuru stared into Natsuki's face, sending a bolt of fear through Natsuki.

After another crash of thunder she spoke, her voice empty and even, "I cannot stand to be around you any longer."

What ever the answer Natsuki had expected, it had not been this. Pain lanced through her chest almost causing her to double over. It was not from her mangled ribs that the pain originated, it was an all too familiar pain, one that had been strangely absent the past month. It now returned in full force, causing her to gasp for air.

"Ho…How can you say that? She asked grasping for words. She really was fighting to stand now, with that verbal blow nearly all the strength had been sapped from her body. "I…I…"

"That's the problem isn't it?" Her head snapped up as the other girl spoke. "You seem to think you are the only one with feelings." Natsuki's eyes widened in shock. "You know how I feel and yet you stay around me, you stay near me, knowing how much it kills me to be close to you. You know what it does to me, and yet even now you won't let me be. I need to get away from you. I need some peace."

"What are you talking about?!" Natsuki cried shaking her head violently.

"You know very well what I mean Natsuki." Shizuru calmly replied.

_ What! I thought you wanted to be near me! I…I…I thought you wanted…_ Natsuki's strength was seeping out of her body fast now. The pain in her chest was taking its place, as it slowly made its way through out her body removing the little strength she had left. She bowed her head and began to cry. _Why are you doing this to me? I thought we were friends, I thought you cared about me. How could you do this to me. Why…_

It hit her then. Shizuru was right. She had been completely selfish. From the first day they had met, she had always been the one revieving. She had never once given back to Shizuru. Even during the festival, even when Shizuru was in her crazed state, she had never stopped giving to her. She had done everything within her power to help Natsuki, knowing that even then she would not be accepted by her. Yes, Natsuki knew how the other girl felt and yet she had selfishly taken from the girl without ever once giving anything back. Never once had she considered her feelings, she had only taken what she wanted and given nothing back, like a parasite.

_ I'm so sorry Shizuru. I'm so sorry. I'm just so scared. Scared of all of this, of being closer to you. I just…I cant do it. But please… I can't be without you._

She realized now that out of all the things that scared her, living without Shizuru was what frightened her the most.

"Do…Don't do this Shizuru…"

There was no hesitation in her voice when Shizuru answered. "I must, for my self, and for you Natsuki."

The pain in Natsuki's chest immediately got worse. All her anger was gone, all her resolve long since faded. She had nothing left, except the burning hole in her chest. She fell to her knees, not feeling pain anywhere else but in her chest. She had no strength left. What could she say to this girl who had given her so much? Who had saved her from a dark and colorless life. Who had pulled her out of the hole she was now sinking back into.

She couldn't cry anymore. She couldn't feel anymore. Except for the burning emptiness in her chest there was nothing.

"Natsuki…" She looked up again, hoping for something, anything to help get rid of this pain. Light once again flooded the room, revealing Shizuru's face once again to the kneeling girl. She was smiling. That cold, dead, lifeless smile. And her eyes, they were empty, emptier than Natsuki had ever seen before. Emptier than during the Festival. Shizuru's voice didn't falter in the slightest when she said, "I can't love you anymore."

Thunder and lightning ripped across the sky as Natsuki felt something inside her break. She recoiled as if struck when the pain that had been centered in her chest and was slowly leaking out, lanced out across her body, sapping the last bit of strength she had left. She fell to the ground, barely supporting her self with her hands. She was gasping for air, fighting to stay conscious. She tried to say something but couldn't think of anything. She really had nothing left.

"Natsuki…" Once again her head snapped up, her pleading eyes searching for the other girls. All she found was a face covered by hair and shadows. "I think it's time for you to leave."

She couldn't move. Shock covered her face as she stared at the shadow in front of her, still hoping to catch a glimpse of those eyes. Something died in her. She felt all feeling slip away. It drained out of her, and was replaced by something else. Something dark and heavy that took up residence in her chest.

Slowly standing she kept her eyes focused on the carpet in front of her. Saying nothing, she closed her hands into fists once again, and made her way to the door, no longer limping, she barely felt her injuries now. At the door she rested her hand on the door frame, her physical fatigue beginning to filter through her new emptiness.

She stood there for a minute, looking out into the rain but not really seeing anything. _Is there anything I can do to stop this? I…_

A small ray of hope had ignited in her chest. _Maybe if I can…_

"Shizuru…" Not turning around to see if the other girl had made any move towards her she waited for a response. Hearing none she continued, "I lo…I…" She dropped her head. Even now, even when she was going to loose the most important person in her life, she couldn't say it. "Goodbye."

And with that she walked out of the apartment, back into the storm feeling nothing once again. The rain, fell on her unnoticed, the thunder barely audible. She had nothing again. Nothing, but the feeling of being abandoned. Just like all those years ago.

* * *

A/N: Was it to bad? Ok for the spoiler, its not really a spoiler but to those who care, the story will HAVE A GOOD ENDING, as will probably ALL my stories, but that doesnt mean the characters dont have to work for the good ending...Also shizuru is an extremely hard character for me to write about, so if i go way ooc on her please let me know, same with natsuki. While many of you are going wtf on what shizuru is saying wait till next chapter to get some enlightenment on that. Again sorry for the lateness but i was striving for perfection and fell far short, but settled on this because of time. Please read and enjoy )

P.S: im not exactly sure what a beta is so would anyone mind enlightenening me on this? Please do it through a PM not a reveiw, and...if anyone would like to do Omake's for me please let me know, my humer sucks and im not gonna buture the characters anymore by trying to make something funny when i suck at it. Again please do this through PMs.

Read and Enjoy

ssjx7squall


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: WARNING: LOTS OF NOTES!! Wow, you guys really like the last chapter, i was amazed by all the reveiws i got and how quickly they came in. Thank you guys for taking the time to read my story, and i am proud to say no one said either character was very OOC so i guess i did alright ) And, i was hit by inspiration and felt like writing so this chapter was born in record time. Now, i guess ill do the reveiw answers but first, if you read my last chapter you may enjoy a little Omake made by one of my favorite authors rainee-chan )

OMAKE:

ssjx7squall: i ahh..i ahh...can't we talk about this later? -looks around trying to find a safe place to hide-

Shizuru: Ara, ara but you werent very talkative before. -lifting her naginata-

natsuki: shizuru! wait you dont have to do -!

shizuru: but didnt evil squall make you cry?

natsuki: ahh..well..ahh -natsuki gets flashbak and goes to a corner to grief- sniffs...it...it..was..-kneeling and doing circles with her hand-

shizuru: -snaps out- Natsuki! -goes try to help her lover-

ssjx7squall: -runs away- THANK YOU OH GREAT GRIEVING NATSUKI!

I realize its odd to do this at the begning but it was for my last chapter and i am thankful, and rainee if you want to do omakes for all my chapters id be honored )

wakamama : Ya im kinda wondering how they will get over it too, i have ideas but connecting those to other ideas is causing a few problems. but thankfully (for me at least) i dont have to worry about the actual getting over it for a bit

rainee-chan: Ha ha well, to tell you the truth, im no longer a Viola fan P, but Fujino is great tho to me she is extremely hard to write and im glad that the you felt something from the chapter )

lindred: Ya, honestly i still think i didnt get the pain she felt across enough, i am still kind of disatisfied with how that turned out

uweichan: Ha im glad you like my story so much and i hope i can keep meeting your expectations. To tell you the truth, i wasnt trying to do anything unique but i was trying to get these two characters to kind of act like real people if you know what i mean. I hope i dont let you down on the shizuru thing, because believe me, the suffering will be very mutual but they will do it differently. I am trying to emphasize a bit on how both these two characters appraoch their emotions and the differences in people.

Ban one: lol i could say the same for you, ive been waiting for the next angel chapter for a while. I'm glad you liked shizuru i just hope you still thought she was real.

silverstri: Oh, they will work, they will suffer, and both sides will learn.

kikyo4ever: Hee hee, Natsuki walked out P and the door is still open (wow i didnt notice the symbolism in that and i wrote it...) and ya, natsuki is in great pain right now having experienced a motorcycle accident my self liket his but on a much smaller bike and slower speeds i know the pain shes in, but adrenaline, need, and somthing to fight for can make you superman

Ok enough of that, sorry the notes were so long but i like giving replies to you all. There is a character (from hime series) who will probably be majorly OOC for most of you. This is because i have never even seen the manga and am running completely on the show, and besides some short air time this guy had almost no characterization added (tho in otome there was more) so i am kind of turning him into my own character, please tell me what you think of him.

* * *

Chapter: 5 

As soon as sound of the motorcycle faded away into the storm Shizuru collapsed. She began sobbing uncontrollably, her face no longer calm and expressionless. "Natsuki-"

She was lying where Natsuki had been standing before she had backed up. Not caring that it was wet, just wanting to keep some kind of connection with the other girl; she buried her head into the carpet sobbing. Rain water, oil and hundreds of other scents came to her as she breathed in between sobs. _Why? Why did it have to be this way?_

It had taken all her strength and concentration to keep that calm face during their argument. It was amazing how something that was second nature was almost impossible to maintain in front of Natsuki. She had never used one of her fake smiles on Natsuki before but tonight she had. She didn't even know if the girl could see her face in the dark room, but she thought she saw a look of pain and terror that was on her face when the lightning struck. She clutched her chest remembering the pain that had lanced through her then.

_Even when I try to help her I hurt her. I'm so sorry._ Burying her head back into the carpet she screamed. So many emotions were racing through her but none so overwhelming as those of pain and loss. _This is it, I will never see her again, it's what's best for her._

"**Is it**?" a voice questioned her in the back of her mind. "**You heard what she was about to say when she was leaving**."

"No!" Shizuru screamed to herself. "She was not going to say that, Natsuki would never."

"**Then why did she look as hurt as she did?**

Shizuru didn't have an answer for this. She had only seen Natsuki with an expression like that once before, during the Hime festival, but this one was different. There was a deeper pain in it, a different kind of fear, and something else she didn't recognize. Then again with the light the way it was she could have just seen what she wanted to see. That thought struck her. _I wanted to see Natsuki hurt? No, that cannot be._

**But it is. You wanted her to feel what you did, the rejection, the pain. You wanted her to go through everything you did.**

"No! I would never want that. I never wanted to hurt her again. Natsuki, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it!" she sobbed no longer fighting the tears. "I love you so much."

**You just wish she loved you back…**

She curled into a ball, grabbing her head hoping to silence the voice that mocked her. No longer hearing the storm through the open door, she was beyond caring about anyone seeing her in such a state. Beyond caring about lying on a wet carpet where just a few minutes ago the person she loved most in the world was standing. The only thing she cared about had just driven away on a motorcycle.

* * *

Miles away, in a dimly lit room a blonde haired man stood motionless in front of a tall window watching the storm outside. He wore a plain business suit, plain shoes, and plain glasses. In fact everything about the man was plain, except maybe for the sharp hawk like features of his face. He wore a small smile as thoughts of future plans and amusing observations of the present drifted through his mind. 

So far, everything had gone according to plan, or rather, things had happened as he knew they would. People were quite predictable once you learned to observe them properly. It required very little manipulation to get things to go the way you wanted, and to know exactly how things would end up.

He sighed softly closing his eyes. He was bored. Breaking down the simple puzzles of human actions and emotions had their high points but for the most part it was boring. Extending his arms out to side he stretched his back, yawning again. Shizuru had left Natsuki shortly after the festival just as he knew she would and Natsuki upon learning of her plans to move away immediately followed.

Folding his hands behind his back again he smiled slightly. The motorcycle accident had been unexpected, though it was just like Kuga to charge ahead ignoring her near life threatening injuries. It was amazing that the girl stayed conscious long enough to reach Fujino's apartment, let alone carry on a conversation, but it showed that things were progressing. Granted they were progressing a little bit faster than expected but this in and of its self was pleasing. _Though I think, Kuga's feelings have a lot more to do with it than anyone will give them credit for._

He was pulled from his thoughts by a small knock from the large double doors on the opposite end of the room. _More annoyances…_ he sighed again before saying. "Come in."

There was a small click as the door handle was turned and a slightly fearful looking young man entered, holding a simple clip board with a few sheets of paper on it. "Sir?"

Slowly walking over to the leather chair set behind a large hard wood desk the slightly annoyed man said, "I assume Kuga has left Fujino's?" He sighed slightly before sitting back into the comfortable leather chair.

The young man had a shocked expression on his face before answering. "Ye…Yes sir." He quickly walked to the center of the room in front of the desk. "But how did you know?"

"Well, if she had died, you wouldn't have knocked, and if she had stayed you wouldn't have come in until they went to sleep which after the day they have had I don't think would have been for quite a while." The man leaned back in the chair putting both his feet up on the desk, placing both his hands behind his head; he turned slightly to the younger man, "Right?"

"Ye...Yes sir."

"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me sir, it gets annoying after a while. So, how serious are Kuga's injuries?"

"Uh…" the younger man nervously began, lifting papers on the clip board searching for the one that held the desire information. "The doctors say she must have begun healing already or she would not have made it to Fujino's apartment without passing out from loss of blood. The injury on her leg was very serious, most of the flesh had been torn revealing the bone but that appears to have been covered up already though our men say that she is still limping slightly. Her arm which we assume was hyper extended seems to have healed a little as well but is still not a complete recovery. The doctors say that she probably broke a couple ribs from the crash as well, but Kuga seems to have some mobility, which suggests that the seriousness of those injuries has lessened considerably. She is still pretty banged up, and the doctors assume that she will not make a full recovery before two weeks."

The man in the chair let many of the other's words wash over him ignoring much of what the young man said. _How did I know they would blame her consciousness on her healing? _He was smiling at his guess until he heard the recovery time. Frowning slightly he turned to the young man, "That long?"

"Ye...Yes. They are taking into consideration that the source of her healing is-"

"Ah," began smith as he again leaned back into the chair, "they are doctors so I guess they wouldn't understand." He chuckled slightly to himself, _Though they are probably just covering for themselves._

"Sir?"

Sighing the man picked his feet off the table, turned to face the younger man standing before him and leaned forward resting his arms on the desk before him. "Now is not a time to be questioning me, there will be time for that later. As things stand I would bet that Kuga will be going back to school by the end of the week. Though, I think she will have different kinds of injuries when she returns."

"Sir?"

Annoyed by the younger man's repeated response the man looked up at him, an annoyed expression on his face. "Listen, Takeda (A/N: not Masashi) I am willing to let you take up the position of my assistant, and if your smart you may learn a few things, but if you call me sir one more time I'll make sure that there is not one person left on this planet with the exception of me that knows you exist. You may go now, oh and make sure you let me know if any of our uninvited guests arrive, and don't bother to tell me when Kuga reaches her home."

Takeda's face went white and he nearly fell as he backed up to the door bowing his head. "Ye..Yes si..Yes Mr. Smith."

As the door closed Mr. Smith smiled, stood, and walked over to the window again. People truly were funny. He chuckled to himself watching the rain pour down on the world outside. People truly were predictable.

* * *

Natsuki nearly fell through her front door as she opened it. She had no idea how she had made it all the way to her small apartment, only that she was finally there. The pain from her injuries had long since sunken in, and if she had not been so emotionally occupied she would have collapsed long ago. Slamming the door behind her she limped into the living room not quite sure what she was going to do. 

Entering the room she vaguely noted that she had left the T.V on and it was now on some news channel, and that sunlight was beginning to shine through her window blinds. Pacing the space in front of her T.V thoughts of the past few hours flooded her mind and what Shizuru had said.

**"I can't love you anymore…"** Shizuru's words echoed through her mind. Natsuki stopped and clenched her fists with her eyes closed. Those cold dead eyes, and that smile.

She wanted to cry. She really did, she wanted to let the tears pour out but she couldn't. They just wouldn't come. The familiar burning emptiness in her chest was there threatening to swallow her.

Blood was running out the sides of her fists, her arms were shaking and her teeth grinding. "Shut up!" Turning and grabbing the T.V from its stand she tore all the cords from the wall as she threw it across the room. The screen shattered when it hit the wall and it fell to the ground with a loud crunch.

Natsuki stared at the broken T.V for a few seconds before she snapped. Grabbing the stand the television had once set on she threw that across the room as well, ignoring the DVD player and playstation as they sailed in opposite directions she kicked the coffee table in the middle of the room and sent it sailing into the hallway.

No longer thinking, she walked throughout her apartment grabbing various objects and throwing them anywhere. Pictures of her and her new friends, furniture, personal trophies, nothing was safe from her rampage. She kicked open the door to her guest bedroom, tearing the door frame from the wall and breaking the handle and lock, she grabbed anything she could and destroyed it. All her muscles were tense her vision blurred and she no longer had control over her actions; the anger rage and pain controlled every aspect of her being Brief thoughts of the two pistols she kept under her bed floated through the back of her mind but a small sane part of her banished it from her hazy consciousness.

She screamed every time she threw something, she screamed every time she kicked a door or punched a wall. All the anger that she wanted to unleash finally came to the surface and she needed to destroy something, anything, she didn't care what. She didn't understand all the emotions that coursed through her and was lashing out in the only way she knew how, by destroying anything close to her.

She had been betrayed again, by the one person she never thought she would have to worry about betraying her. The same damn person that had saved her from her emptiness now threw it back in her face. That damned girl who had once said she loved her.

She screamed again at this and began to furiously punch her bed room door, ignoring the holes she put in it and her blood soaked hands. After the severe beating the door finally fell from her hinges and she made her way back into the living room to find something else she could unleash her rage upon.

Ignoring how her muscles were beginning to cramp and lock up, she kicked over the table next to the couch knocking over the picture that had been resting on it. A small voice in the back of her head told her to stop and pick up the picture. Her rage following any path that was laid before it did as the voice asked, and she bent over to pick it up.

Her vision cleared and her rage subsided slightly when she looked at it. It was a picture of her and Shizuru taken on one of the many "Hime" outings that took place after the festival. There she was in her school uniform, an exasperated but happy look on her face as she looked up at the girl who's arms were around her neck from behind. Shizuru wearing her uniform as well, had one of the few sincere smiles ever caught on film on her face as she looked up at the camera waving with her left arm while her right had a firm grip on Natsuki keeping the younger girl from breaking away.

Natsuki began to shake as she looked at the picture, emotions that had been covered up by anger coming to the surface again. The frame broke, making a long crack between the two girls. Natsuki stared blankly at the picture and the large piece of glass in her hand; she hadn't noticed how hard she was gripping the picture. Rage filled her again and she was about to throw the picture then stopped, looking at the picture again.

Why did this have to happen? Why when they were so happy? Moisture fell on Shizuru's face distorting it slightly. The tears had finally come and now there was no stopping them, they flowed freely from her eyes no matter how hard she tried to hold them back. At her end, her strength finally leaving her, Natsuki fell to her knees and cried.

"Why?" she screamed at the smiling brown haired girl in front of her hoping for an answer. "Why did this happen? I lo..I.." She let out a long scream, "I still can't fucking say it! Why is it so hard." She sobbed. "Why do I have to fucking feel this way?" she screamed before she fell to the ground crying ignoring the broken glass everywhere. Hugging the broken picture to her chest she cried and screamed as all the physical and emotional pain raged through her before finally falling asleep.

* * *

A/N: To tell you the truth, i am more than unhappy with how the last part turned out. Having experienced blinding rage twice in my life im annoyed that all my memory yeilds of the experiences is the color white... So i really dont think i went into depth enough on this but tell me what you think please, i really was trying to get the pain and anger across that natsuki would feel. For those who havent seen me say this before, i am trying to make this pretty close to real life (like how i think real people would react, and ya theres gonna be the action comming up soon) so that means that there may be slow parts in the story and a lot of internal conflicts that well conflict with a characters actions. Another note, i have a habbit of assuming people know things that they have no way of knowing so if i do this here please let me know. 

Oh, and be sure to always where helmets on motorcycles, and cover as much skin as possible. I am not exagerating on how the skin was shredded to the bone, i have heard horror stories of clothing actually melting to skin, bones being worn away in bike accidents. having experienced a low speed crash on a rock road, i can vouch for the skin being torn off. The helmet saved me from my bear head being drug along rocks. So remember kids always wear a helmet

this has been anothe public service anouncment brough to you by ssjx7quall

ssjx7squall


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: This was meant to be a much longer chapter but due to certain circumstances my train of thoughts died in the process of writing this chapter and i ran into quite a few thought blocks. So i am posting this chapter in order to be able to move on with the story in my mind. It's a bad chapter with no real point on its own as it is now but its what i got atm. Sorry no reveiw responeses today, im really not in the right mindset to do that but i am greatful for each and every one guys especially from the authors of stories that i enjoy reading, but on a lighter note i will post rainee-chans omake ) thanx again rainee

omake:

Natsuki: Shizuru...i...i...lov...

Shizuru: you what natsuki?

Natsuki: i...i..lov...lov...I LOVE YOUR BOOBS! -blushing furiously-

Shizuru: -nosebleed, faints-

Natsuki: SHIZURU!? SHIZURU?! WHAT!? WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY WRONG?!

Omake End

And to whoever offered to be my beta im sorry i accidently deleted that email (

without further ado the horrible chapter

* * *

Crash!! 

The annoying beeping stopped as soon as the alarm clock shattered against the wall. Natsuki groaned and rolled onto her back, trying to block the suns rays by putting her arm over her eyes. _I break everything I own, except for that damn alarm clock…_

Groaning again she slowly sat up and sleepily looked around the room. Everything was pretty much as it had been a week ago when she went on her rampage, the T.V and its stand still lay in pieces at one side of the room, the coffee table was in the hallway, and her Playstation was in about 100 pieces a few feet from her. Or was it her D.V.D player? Blinking she tried to focus in on the pieces but soon gave up.

_I wouldn't be able to tell even if I could see straight._ Yawning she stretched her arms out to either side trying to loosen up the knots in her back before settling back down on the couch. She lay there, staring at probably the only surface in the apartment that didn't have a hole in it before realizing what today was.

"Oh, shit!" Bolting upright she rushed to the bathroom, leaping over fallen objects in her way as if she had not received a serious leg injury only a week ago.

Today was the day she was going back to school. It had been no more than a week since her late night encounter with Shizuru and she had physically recovered enough to return to school.

* * *

After initially waking up the night after her tirade surrounded by the remains of everything she owned, she discovered that she could barely move. The injuries she had ignored the previous night hit her like a sledgehammer, sapping her strength from her. What was worse, her actions in her apartment had painfully cramped up all her muscles meaning movement was that much more painful. 

She had had to crawl to her bathroom to begin cleaning her wounds. By the time she made it there, she was bleeding from all her injuries again and gasping for air.

Painfully peeling off the shredded biker suit that was stuck to her body because of all the blood, she saw that her injuries were not nearly as bad as she had thought they were the night before. Her leg and hip were still shredded and after cleaning them, she began the arduous task of sewing them up, but gashes were not as deep as she had originally thought. She noticed that oddly enough she didn't really have any minor abrasions, but her muscles still screamed out in pain and it would be impossible to find out if that was from the crash or from the destroying of her apartment.

By the time she was done cleaning up, there was a large pile of bloody glass and gauze in the trash. Pulling out the glass wasn't as bad as she had thought it would be, the hard part was wrapping the bandage around her chest for her ribs. Unfortunately her ribs were just as bad as she had thought they were, worse in fact because of her actions after the accident. Angry bruises covered her entire torso confirming her idea of broken ribs.

Realizing that she would not be able to go to school or do much of anything before she healed and not wanting her hard work to go to waste she quickly called Sakomizu and explained her situation. He said he would let the absences slide as long as she found someone to bring her, her school work in the mean time.

Thanking him she hung up. Groaning she stared at her phone for a while dreading what she knew she had to do. Sighing, she began scrolling through her contact list and hit the call button on the desired name.

On the second ring the person picked up. "Yes, hello?"

"Hi Mai…" Natsuki began before quickly pulling the phone away from her ear as said girl screamed.

"Natsuki! Where are you? You went running off the other day and didn't come back to school the next day! I almost went to the police! I tried calling you and stopped by your apartment and everything but you never answered, and there was something about a motorcycle accident the other day but the rider left the sce-"

"Mai! I'm fine, don't worry about it." Natsuki said hoping to cut the girl off. She knew Mai would react this way which is exactly why she didn't want to call her. "But I do need to ask a favor."

"You don't sound fine…Are you sure nothing happened? Reito said he saw you speeding off on your bi—"

"I said I'm fine damn it! Listen, I'm not gonna be able to come to school for a few days and I need you to bring me my homework and some notes if you can." This was becoming far more annoying than she felt like dealing with at the moment.

There was silence on the other end of the line before Mai timidly began, "Ok…Why aren't you going to be able to come to school?"

Natsuki's grip on her phone tightened, "Listen, it's none of your damn business, are you going to help me out or not?" Mai was the last person she felt like dealing with right now, well, maybe not the last person.

"Fine, what the heck happened to you? Never mind, no need to yell at me again, I guess I'll just drop off the notes after school then."

"Just slide them under my door, thanks." Without waiting for a reply she hung up. Sighing she dropped the phone on the floor before falling back on the couch, wincing when she landed. "Bad idea…"

Looking around her dark apartment she noticed a red glow coming from something across the room. Groaning she lifted her self up and walked toward it. Pushing aside the debris that covered it she blinked for a moment when she realized what it was. Sitting upright, with out a scratch on it was her alarm clock reminding her that it was 2:36 a.m. "Why the hell couldn't you be my Playstation?" she asked it before throwing every back on top of it.

Walking back to the couch she was about to lay down again when something caught her eye. The picture she had fallen asleep holding was lying in the middle of a pile of glass. Before she knew what she was doing, she was bending over to pick it up.

Tears began to flow from her eyes as she stared at the smiling chestnut haired girl in the picture. _Why? Why did you—NO! I'm NOT doing this again._

Angrily shaking her head, trying to fight off the tears, Natsuki raised the picture over her head to throw it. Just as she was about to send it flying across the room, she stopped.

Looking down at the picture again, she couldn't fight the urge to cry. _Damn you! Damn you, damn you, damn you, why did you do this to me?_

Tears streaming down her face she laid down on the couch and for the second time fell asleep crying, holding the picture of her and the only person she cared about.

* * *

Sighing Natsuki stepped out of the shower drying her hair. Her injuries, at least those that showed on the surface had all healed but she was still sore and the warm water helped her relax. 

Leaning against the sink she stared down at her bruised and cut up hands. These injuries had not healed, probably because she wouldn't let them as she found her self destroying more and more of her home each day.

_This is going to be a very long day._ Sighing she stood up, grabbed some bandages from the shelf and started to wrap up her hands.

Once she was dressed in her school uniform she walked to her closet with only a slight limp to find another biking outfit. The remains of her former suit lay forgotten on the bathroom floor.

After zipping up the new suit she began to look for her helmet. It was only after about fifteen minutes of searching through the rubble in her apartment she remembered she had thrown it in the parking lot a week earlier just before her encounter with Shizuru.

Clenching her fists and grinding her teeth to fight back memories of that night, she kicked the coffee table across the room, grabbed her books and school work off the floor and stormed out the door slamming it behind her.

Storming towards her bike she jumped on and was about to turn it on before she remembered she had a spare helmet. Turning around she opened the compartment on the back and grabbed the spare. She was about to put it on before she caught a familiar scent.

Looking down at the helmet in her hands Natsuki remembered the only other person who ever wore this helmet. This time she was not able to fight back the memories and the tears began to fall.

* * *

A/N: The last section was not even reread. I wrote it tonight in order to give some kind of end to this section of the story. Just another note, because of some seriouse personal issues that are kinda screwin with my mental state atm it might be a while before i even begin the next chapter. I started this one very optimistically but things started happening in the middle and it became a fight to type each letter, unfortunatly for me writing is not a good outlet unless im drunk (I.E Alone) So enough of that emo crap, just one last note, all you authors who read my sad story who have stories of their own that i enjoy hurry up with your next chapters, i need a good distraction right now 

ssjx7squall


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Well, i dont know what happened, but i guess if you look at my writing as a person, that last chapter was very "thereputic." i was able to move on with the story because i was hit with some serious inspiration tonight and well im getting overly exited and posting it without rereading it. Ill, be short but on a small emo note, for the first time in my life, i almost had tears coming out of both eyes on the last lines of this chapter, i dont know if its because of whats going on personally right now or if the chapter is good? but iguess we will find out. Thank you all who had subscribed to this story guys that means just as much to me as a reveiw and i appreciate it greatly, and to those who reveiw thanx alot as well. Again im not in the right mind set to be able to right responses.

* * *

Sighing Mai turned to look out the window again. Bright sunlight poured through the open windows of the small classroom as the teacher went off on some lecture about how important knowledge of the past was in order to approach the future with a clear mind. Mai had given up on taking notes in this class because the teacher never stayed on topic and the briefs moments he did came out to useless gibberish.

_It's been a week now; I hope she's alright, that phone call…_ Remembering the phone call she received from Natsuki a few days ago Mai's brows furrowed. _Why after all the work she has put in the past month would she decide to start ditching again? Well, I guess she's at least planning on doing some work if she asked me to take notes but why wouldn't she want to see me, and why was she so angry? She hasn't been like that for a long time._

Watching some birds fly around playfully chasing each other she drifted off into thoughts of her blue haired friend not hearing the distant roar of a motorcycle. _I hope she's alright…I wonder when she will be back._

The wind began to pick up outside and she turned her attention to the trees now swaying in the wind, their branches swaying side to side lazily. Leaves and other foliage blew through the air, picked up by small wind currents to be carried off to some other part of the school grounds. _It really is a pretty day._

Watching leaves being blown across the main walkway leading to the front of the school she noticed a lone figure walking in the distance heading towards the school. Unconsciously squinting to get a better picture of the approaching figure she noticed that whoever it was, was limping slightly. Not really thinking at this point, Mai didn't even try to guess who the figure was.

Turning her attention back to the teacher to see if he had finished his rant, she was greeted with the sound of the bell. There was a sudden shuffling as students began to stand, grab their books and slowly exit the class. Mai merely began to stretch extending her arms out to either side, casually glancing out the window when she saw something that made her stop.

The figure that she had earlier ignored was much closer now and their features fully discernable. Blue hair caught up in the wind whipped to one side of the girl's face as she limped her way up the steps to the school. Natsuki, in her school uniform wore her usual scowl as she fought the wind to gain some control over her hair.

"She's back!" Mai cried, receiving a raised eyebrow from the teacher who was now sitting at his desk. Quickly grabbing her things Mai leapt from her seat and ran to the entrance of the school.

Fighting her way through the crowd, uncharacteristically pushing her way through she finally reached the entrance. Looking around for any sign of her friend she took a few steps outside. After a few minutes of trying to spot Natsuki in the mass of students she gave up. Sighing she turned around, only to almost bump into Reito who was standing behind her.

"Ah!" she exclaimed as she took a hurried step back, almost falling down, but was saved as two strong hands gripped her shoulders.

"Are you alright Tokiha-san?" Reito questioned her, releasing her shoulders when he was sure she had proper footing.

Blushing slightly Mai stuttered, "I...I'm fine thank you Kanzaki-san."

Watching Mai patting down her uniform in an attempt to straighten it, Reito smiled, "How many times do I have to say to call me Reito, Tokiha-san?" Waving off Mai's embarrassed protests he continued, "If I may ask, what are you doing out here right now? I did not think you had any classes in this part of the school today."

Blushing again Mai was staring at her feet avoiding Reito's eyes. "I was looking for Natsuki. I thought I saw her and she hasn't been to school for a week now and when I talked to her last she seemed….distressed."

Looking up and into the crowd Reito seemed to be searching for the blue hair girl himself. "I wasn't aware that she hasn't been coming to school. That's quite odd considering how hard she has been working the past month. Shizuru has been telling me…" he trailed off, staring ahead, seemingly lost in thought.

"Reito-san?" Mai questioned him worry in her voice.

He seemed to come back down to earth and looked back down at her, causing her to blush slightly as their eyes met again. "I think you should find her Mai-san. I have a feeling she is really going to need your help right now, and now if you will please excuse me." with that he turned and began to walk away.

Snapping out of the slight haze she was in Mai called out, "Wait! What do you mean? Do you know something Reito-san?" he merely raised his arm and waved as he disappeared into the crowd.

By now her shouting had attracted some attention from students walking near by. Blushing again Mai hurried off and began to search again for Natsuki.

* * *

Limping through the hallways of Fuka Academy Natsuki was given a wide berth. Students were going out of their way to avoid the obviously angry girl. Her scowl was a sharp contrast the state she was in the last time any of the students saw her. She radiated a threatening aura, daring anyone to approach or touch her.

Takeda upon seeing her in this state assumed he had done something to anger the girl and all color drained from his face. He began to run in the opposite direction knocking everyone in his path out of the way in order to put as much distance between himself and the fuming girl.

Instead of following in pursuit Natsuki merely turned into a classroom and took up her usual seat by the window. She removed her scowl and took on the appearance of being bored, the stares she received walking down the halls were only feeding her agitation and anger. There was now a small crowd outside the room looking in on the girl who had been absent from school for a week and was now twenty minutes early to her class. _Why can't everyone just mind their own damn business? I do it, why is it so fucking hard for them?_

* * *

It had taken a long time but she had finally managed to stop crying that morning. The tears that seemed to overwhelm her every so often seemed to turn into a blind rage, in which her vision would go white. She would later find her self standing in the middle of her apartment with new bruises and cuts on her hands and forearms, her knuckles taking most of the damage.

As soon as she had stopped crying the confused anger began to build within her again. Fighting for control of her emotions and feeding the growing anger with the frustration of not being able to control her emotions she ran back into her apartment.

She didn't lose it this time though. Her vision began to blur but she remained in control, her fists clenched, arms flexed, legs rooted to the ground and teeth grinding. After every time she lost control she would break down crying again all the emotions rushing forth. This usually lasted until she fell asleep or was to tired to move.

This time however, her vision returned to her and she began to take shallow breaths, not seeming to be able to get enough oxygen. The tears didn't come. She wouldn't let them. Clamping her eyes shut, and flexing each and every muscle in her body until they cramped, she fought them, and for the first time won out. When she did though she felt herself sink deeper into the emptiness in her chest.

Slowly opening her eyes, Natsuki began to relax her muscles and catch her breath again. This time she had won, she just hoped it didn't happen at school.

Quickly washing her face, she exited her apartment for the second time, locked the door and walked down the steps. Approaching her bike she stared at the helmet that had started this morning's "episode" lying on the cold asphalt of the parking lot.

Before she had time to sink deeper into thought she reached down grabbed the helmet and put it on. Refusing to breath through her nose she jumped on her bike and sped off towards school faster than she ever had before.

Natsuki was snapped out of her thoughts as the school bell rang. Assuming class was beginning she sighed and leaned back in her chair casually glancing around the class room.

She was shocked when she realized students were standing from their seats and exiting the classroom. _What? There's no way!_ She looked at the clock for her answer. Amazingly it showed that class was indeed over.

She sat there dumbfounded for a few seconds before snapping out of it suddenly. _Wow, I am really out of it. I cant keep this up…_

Gathering her things she quietly exited the classroom. Once again begin met with glances that always avoided her eyes she sighed. _This is going to be a __**very**__ long day._

* * *

Running around campus, Mai was frantically looking for Natsuki again. Ever since her encounter with Reito she had looked for her friend between all her classes and at lunch to no avail. It was now the end of the day and she was hoping to catch her before she left so she could find out what was wrong.

The wind whipped up again giving her a chill as it sent her hair flying. She stopped running and held her coat close to her and bowed her head hoping to fight off the chill. When the wind died down she looked up again she caught sight of the one she had been searching all day for.

Natsuki was walking ahead of her, still limping, her books thrown over her shoulder. "Natsuki!" calling out Mai began to run toward her friend.

Natsuki stopped walking, turned slightly, saw Mai approaching, then turned around and continued on her original path. Startled by this action Mai ran up to Natsuki and questioned her, "Where have you been?!"

Natsuki kept on walking, not turning to look at Mai when she answered in a low voice, "No where."

"Then why are you limping?! How did you hurt your leg?" Mai continued trying to match Natsuki's quick pace but falling behind.

Natsuki's brow furrowed slightly, intensifying her scowl. "I'm fine."

Mai let out an exasperated sigh. "It doesn't look that way." Looking down at Natsuki's hands she noticed bandages covered the both, with red spots where her knuckles were. "What happened to your hands?!"

Natsuki quickened her pace slightly. "Nothing, I said I'm fine."

"You're not fine! Look at your hands!"

"I said I'm fine damn it! Leave me alone!" Natsuki snapped.

Mai fell behind a few steps at this. _What's wrong with her? She hasn't acted like this since… since… since I first met her._ _I have to help her._

Running up she gently grabbed Natsuki's hand, hoping she didn't hurt the girl. Natsuki stopped, still not looking back at her. "Natsuki, tell me what's wrong, I can help you, I'm your friend. I don't know what happened but I can help."

Then thinking back on her conversation with Reito a thought struck her. "Does it have something to do with Shizuru?"

The hand that she was gripping clenched. The arm that she held on to tightened. Natsuki's entire frame stiffened, and when she spoke, her voice was low and her tone dangerous. "Mai… Let go of me… Now."

Her voice had been very low when she spoke, and the wind had made it hard to hear but Mai her every word. The final word a command that spoke of a promise of something dangerous if it was not obeyed.

Mai let go of Natsuki's arm quickly. She couldn't believe what was happening. Her good friend who had just started opening up to everyone, who had just started to enjoy life, was now closing her off. _Something has happened._ She couldn't understand what though, what could have happened to have changed Natsuki so much in a week? It didn't make any sense. She had been so happy when Mai had last saw her and then she had just disappeared and returned like…like this.

Natsuki had started walking again as soon as Mai had released her arm. After a few steps though she stopped, a gust of wind cutting across the path again sending her hair flying about her shoulders. The girl before Mai now was like a brick wall, impenetrable and unmovable.

"Mai…"

Mai quickly looked up at her friend, hoping for some means to help her.

"Stay away from me. I don't want to see you again."

And with that she continued walking again, leaving behind a slowly tearing up Mai.

_

* * *

I'm sorry Mai, but I'm not going to let anyone get close again. Shizuru was the last… It's not going to happen again. _With that she put on the helmet again and sped off towards her apartment, hoping for a tearless sleep, but the tears were already starting to come.

* * *

Miles away, sunlight fought to get through blinds into a dark room. Shizuru rolled over in bed, fitfully twitching in her sleep. "Natsu...ki." The name escaping her lips as she rolled over again in her sleep.

On the table next to the bed rested a helmet, once belonging to the blue haired girl. Shizuru had retrieved it shortly after she had stopped crying that night, only to begin again when she had found it. She had rushed outside into the rain hoping to stop Natsuki already knowing that the girl had driven away but she didn't care.

Nothing was left of the girl but the helmet, lying in a puddle of water and the burning feeling in Shizuru's chest. She had nearly lost it like she did during the festival, but this time she had debatably held on to her sanity.

Confining herself to her bedroom, she never left the bed. Not to answer the phone, not to go to school, and not to eat. Drifting in and out of consciousness, her dreams filled with painful images of the one she loved refusing her again. Images of the pain on Natsuki's face when Shizuru had told her she couldn't love her anymore. Her conscious hours were few and filled with nothing but tears and the pain in her chest that threatened to consume her. She could no longer cope with the pain.

She had once again brought suffering upon Natsuki. Even when she tried to help her she hurt the poor girl. But she still questioned herself on whether or not she meant to help her in the first place. Her dreams were filled with arguments with herself over her reasons for sending the girl away.

Did she desire to hurt Natsuki? She didn't know anymore, she couldn't bring herself to face reality anymore, her dreams were bad enough. The doubts that plagued her mind tormented her in her sleep and her waking hours alike. The very idea of wanting to hurt Natsuki tearing her apart.

Tears began to pour down a sleeping Shizuru's face. Hugging a pillow fiercely she curled up, shaking violently. "Natsuki…. I love you."

* * *

A/N: Now ill kinda explain my stupid emo moment while writing this, it just kinda happened as i typed out the last paragraph without thinking, (it is kind of a precedent, im not a cryer and almost tears are pretty big...) Again warning you guys, i will probably be pretty emo for the next month or two, i will try to keep it out of my A/Ns and reveiw responses, but since none of you posted updates to your own stories this writing was a very good distraction for me. Well anyways hope you enjoyed it, let me know what you think

P.S. Oh, i'm not really looking for a beta persay, but if anyone would be willing to help me add a little bit of humer here and there in this story thatd be great. The past few sections have been meant to be serious but there will be a time in the future especially with shivers the Mai scenes (i perosnally dont like her that much or most of the characters involved with her I.E mikoto "sorry guys" tate, reito, etc) This is not gonna be a story where mai fixes Shizuru's and Natsuki's relationship just to let you guys know too, but about the beta let me know, humor has never been my strong point and atm its so far from my mind its sad

ssjx7squall


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: This may be a weird chapter for most of you because it involves a character that was never really developed in the Hime show (tho he was in Otome but im now workin with that char) and another that i made up. Thats it really. This is mainly because this chapter didnt really turn out how i wanted to and after the last line of it i tried writing the second part of the chapter and ran into a brick wall, every sentance i put down came out retarded so im putting this chapter for the same reason i did the one two chapters ago, to get the scene out of the way so i can move on. Again sorry not reveiw comments, but i am sorry that i made some of you guys cry but i guess that means i did a good job as a writer ). While some of you may not think that this chapter will have much relavence this relationship will become important later and this was just kind of introducing the relationship these two have as well as giving background info on the familier face in this chapter. No natsuki or shizuru in this chapter so fear not no possible tears. Also, this chapter was not reread, sorry trying to move on in my head with the story

posting this a second time because someone got me for my bad german, freebie translators off the internet suck lol but thanx alot for the the help if you are reading this (it was anon) i really should have researched it better but well im lazy sorry

ssjx7squall

Translations:

vater - father

mutter - mother

verdamnt - damn it

Trottel - shit head

Halts Maul - shut up (again not sure)

* * *

The sun was beginning to set sending dark orange rays across the sky. A man sat on a bench, arms out stretched to either side resting on the back of the bench with his back the Regnitz River. 

_I always forget how beautiful the sunsets are here…_ John Smith thought has he unconsciously began to whistle. _I wonder how much longer he's going to be._

It was then that a man appeared down the street heading in his direction. _Ah finally._ Smith stood and began to stretch. "What took you so long Armin!" he spoke in perfect German.

Armin who had steadily been getting closer cringed slightly when he heard his name spoken. "I really wish you wouldn't call out my name like that in a public place.

Smith got a confused look on his face. "What? Why? What does the director of the mighty Schwarz Company have to fear? Both of our employers know we are here and who we are so why bother hiding it?"

Sighing Armin walked up and embraced Smith. "Irreverent as always eh brother?"

"Well you know me, so how's Katherine and the kids? Smith said backing off from the hug.

"Fine fine, and how's the woman in your life? Armin questioned jokingly as he sat down on the bench.

Shrugging Smith put his hands out to either side. "Non existent, I can't find one who will put up with me or my work."

Laughing Armin said, "I think it's just you they can't stand."

Laughing as well Smith answered and sat next to the other, "Ah well, relationships are something I have never been really good at dealing with, now international espionage, assassinations, corporate dealings, no problem but women give me a headache."

"Ha, I can't wait for the day you find a girl that will knock you on your ass." Armin joked.

"Ah, well the days where I will meet such a woman are narrowing, you got lucky with Katherine."

Armin got a far off look in his eyes as he stared into the distance. When he spoke his voice was low, "Yes, yes I did."

"Oh calm down." Smith said clapping his brother on the back. "Don't drift out on me now."

"You should come see father." Armin said suddenly.

It was Smith's turn to become serious now. Visually stiffening he leaned back slightly. "Has he gotten worse?"

"He doesn't have much time; you should see him before its too late." Armin answered still staring off into the distance.

"I doubt he wants to see me. He is still furious that I didn't take his place as the director of the company." Smith laughed but it was empty of mirth. "He disowned me the moment I left for Japan. One of the few reasons I dropped the Stager name."

After a few moments of silence Armin said, "You did abandon your family, including me."

Smith sighed and leaned back on the bench, looking up at the slowly darkening sky. _This again…_ "I had things I had to take care of, Japan offered me my own life instead of one dictated by vater. Besides, you turned out fine, he may be an ass but vater cares about you."

"And you too." Armin said.

Silence settled on the two again. The running water behind them making a peaceful noise as it flowed through the city. The sun had all but set now and streetlights were beginning to turn on down the street. Still staring at the sky Smith spoke. "What are your men doing in my country?"

Armin scoffed slightly. "Your country?"

"Answer the question." Smith said lacking any of his usual sarcasm.

Sighing Armin leaned forward resting his arms on his legs. "I assume if you know they are there you can guess as to why. Schwarz is interested in these so called…Hime's" The Japanese word sounded odd with a heavy German accent.

"I would suggest you back off." Smith said his voice empty.

"We are merely observing as of yet, but you know what will happen if I am given the order." Armin said quietly ignoring the hidden threat.

"I can't keep from coming after you if you continue this brother. The council may have given me a lot of power but despite how indispensable I am they may think other wise if they begin to think I have become a liability."

"I am in the same boat John, yet unlike you I have a family to consider." Armin's voice was beginning to fill with anger.

"You knew what you were getting into when you took the position. You know what happened to mutter because of vater's position and yet you willingly put your family at risk." Smith said his vision still glued to the night sky.

"I stayed for my family!" Armin yelled standing up suddenly, glaring at Smith. "Unlike you, I stayed to take care of our brothers and sisters!"

"And look what happened." Smith slowly looked down to his brother. "They all died, despite how you tried to protect them. Vater's business claimed them all."

"At least I tried verdammen ie es! I didn't abandon them all."

"Your right. And that's why you're a better man than I am." Smith said slowly standing. "And unlike me, you care." He patted his brother on the shoulder a few times, "Just don't turn into vater, because unlike him your family means more to you than your business."

Armin was stunned by this. His brother had never said anything as deep or touching as this in all the years he had known him.

"Now, Trottel," Smith said ruining the moment. "Are we going to get to this birthday party or not? If I know Katherine she won't be happy if we are late."

Shaking his head slightly at the sudden subject change Armin answered, "Yeah, we should probably get going, did you remember a gift this time?"

Smiling proudly Smith answered, "Sure did!" Reaching underneath the bench he pulled out a small wrapped package.

Armin smiled as they began to walk down the street, "What did you get Max?"

"Max?" Smith stopped looking down at the package.

Turning back to look Armin saw a surprised look on his face. "John?"

"Max is a boys name right?"

"Yeah…"

"I don't suppose he would like a Barbie…."

Sighing Armin dropped his shoulders shaking his head. "I only have three kids? How the hell do you confuse them more than I do? Well, don't worry about it, Katherine figured you would screw up so she bought a gift for him from you."

"How thoughtful of me." Smith said smiling.

"Halts Maul."

* * *

A/N: There it is, hopefully i will be able to move, you will know cus if i can there will be a chapter out within the next week with the characters that you guys actually care about, the main problem is there is a alot of mai in the next chapter and i dont like writing her and to write someone so "uppity" in my current mood is a pain in the ass so heres to hopeing 

ssjx7squall


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: I'll keep it short today. The one day i have time to write im not in the mood for it, but since i needed to progresst he story i did. Unfortunatly as i warned, to progress i needed to right from Mai's POV which i feeli suck at and hate doing personally so unfortunatly no shiznat today in this one but info is supplied.

Sorry no review responses again guys. I am sure i will do it again soon. But i would like to say THANK YOU to all my readers. Especially those who reveiw, favorite, and alert my story. The last two are just as great as reveiwing and greatly appreciated. I am truly thankful for you guys who read this story and stick with it since i am kind of a new author here. I dont want anyone to feel obligated to review or anything but i just want to give a big THANK YOU to all those who do any of the above 3 things mentioned. Oh, and negative reviews are welcome and in some cases appreciated, someone got me on my horrible german last chapter (which is not corrected) and i expect all of you to do the same if you come across things like that. exxcept on this chapter because im sure its bad.

ssjx7squall

* * *

Sighing Mai leaned her head against the bus window. It was the late afternoon and she was barely getting off of work. Normally she would be on her way home right now but she had a certain stop to make.

* * *

It had been more than three weeks since Natsuki had broken ties with her and she had barely seen her ex friend at all except for a few passing glimpses. The one time she tried to talk to Natsuki again, the girl just radiated pure anger, forming a barrier between Mai and her.

Nonetheless Mai's caring attitude kept her going, in her search for the cause of the blue haired girl's change. The next day she decided to talk to the one person who would know about anything that happened to Natsuki. Shizuru.

The next day after school she went straight to the student council room. As she rounded the corner into the hallway she heard loud yelling coming from the room.

"What the hell does that woman think she is?" came Haruka's angry voice.

"Who…" came a quiet correction from Yukino.

"Shizuru that's who! Haven't you been paying attention Yukino?"

By this time Mai was standing outside the door and she heard Yukino sigh.

"Maybe we should get to the business at hand rather than worrying about "What" the former Kaichou thinks she is." Came Reito's calm voice.

Mai stopped at this. _What? Former Kaichou? What happened to Fujino-sama?_

"Well how can we when that woman just goes and lifts off without saying a word to anyone?" Haruka yelled.

"Goes off…"

"That's what I said Yukino!"

Curiosity overcoming her Mai quietly opened the door to peer into the room. Haruka was busy pacing back and forth down the length of the room, while Yukino was sitting quietly in a chair in the corner. Reito was calmly sitting in Shizuru's chair behind her desk. _Where is Fujino-sama?_

It was then that Reito spotted her in the doorway and called out to her. "Oh, hello Tokiha-san. Why don't you come in here?"

Mai squeaked at hearing her name. Blushing slightly she opened the door all the way and entered the room. "Uh…I was…I was just looking for the Kaichou…"

Reito smiled at Mai before answering. "Oh she isn-"

"She isn't here right now! That woman went and left the school without wording a thing to anyone!" Haruka interrupted.

"Saying…" Yukino said quietly in the corner.

Clearing his throat slightly Reito eyed Haruka before starting again. "What Haruka means to say, is that Shizuru no longer attends this school."

"What!?" Mai blurted out without thinking. Blushing she covered her mouth as if to keep more words in.

Reito slowly stood and made his way towards Mai, placing his hand on her shoulder he looked down at her, "Why don't you come with me for a moment?"

"What!" Haruka cried. "We have work to take care of here!"

Reito looked over to Haruka and smiled. "I am confidant that I can leave everything in your capable hands. Now shall we?" he finished lifting his other arm to direct Mai into the hallway.

Without thinking Mai allowed herself to be guided into the hallway, not hearing Haruka complaining behind. Reito closed the door than turned to Mai. "I assume this has something to do with Natsuki?"

Snapping out of her daze Mai stared at Reito for a minute before answering. "Ye..Yes. How did you know?"

"I guess I should have known something would happened when Shizuru told me that she would be leaving. I really thought she would tell Natsuki but I guess she went through with her plan." Reito's arms were crossed, his chin resting on a fist in a thinking posture.

Mai just stared at him not really understanding what he meant. _What? She just left somewhere without telling Natsuki anything? Of course that's why Natsuki is so angry._

Noticing Mai's blank stare Reito lifted his head up slightly. "You see, Shizuru was offered a scholarship at a university. Since her grades were flawless her entire high school career, they said she could start immediately if her school would allow it. A few quick discussions later she was allowed to go. For what ever reason though she wanted to keep her leaving very quiet. I suppose it had something to do with her fan-girls but she was adamant about not letting Natsuki know that she was leaving. In fact the only reason she let me know is because I would have to take her position when she left."

Mai was stunned by this. _Why would she not want Natsuki to know? Unless.._ "Kanzaki-san, do you know where she is now?"

"Yes, but as I said before she doesn't want anyone to know."

"Please!" Mai pleaded. "You have to tell me, Natsuki is out getting hurt doing god knows what and it's all because of Shizuru leaving!"

Sighing Reito looked at her again. "And you think knowing where Shizuru is will help her? I am sure Natsuki knows where Shizuru is."

"How could you know?"

"Because she came and threatened to put me in a hospital if I didn't tell her where Shizuru went."

Mai was speechless. _Then what… Natsuki would have gone to… What could have happened?_

"Would you still like to know where she is?"

Reito's voiced once again snapped Mai out of her thoughts. He was looking into her eyes, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Yes, please. I need to talk to her."

"I don't know if it will help Kuga-san but here you go." He said handing her a piece of paper.

"It has Shizuru's address on it." He said seeing her puzzled expression. "I don't know if it will help Kuga-san but I am sure Shizuru is in bad shape at the moment as well."

"Wha-"

"I need to go now Tokiha-san. Please feel free to stop by any time you wish." Turning around he went back into the classroom leaving a speechless Mai behind.

* * *

Unfortunately life and many other things had gotten in her way of visiting Shizuru. Mai had been trying to find the right time to talk to Natsuki about Shizuru but the other girl had become very good at avoiding her and the few times Mai was lucky enough to see her, the other girl was protected by her impenetrable wall of anger. By this point Mai was certain that the cause of the change in her friend was Shizuru, it was the only thing that had ever effected the other girl like this.

School work had also been piling up for her as the year was coming to a close. That her job, and a certain middle schooler who couldn't go an hour without Mai cooking something for her occupied most of her time, making this trip extremely difficult to find time for.

_Sorry Mikoto I'm going to be late today._ Mai was picturing Mikoto passed out in the middle of the floor of their dorm when the bus came to a stop. Looking up she noticed that this was her stop and quickly hopped off the bus. She looked down at the piece of paper Reito had given her and began to look for the address.

* * *

mini feed:

-nao and natsuki stare as mikoto continues poking without stopping squall-

-squall is currently curled in a ball backing back and forth-

Nao: how long has it been?

Natsuki: well, mikoto has been poking for like hmm 5hours

Nao: -sweatdrop- emo again?

Natsuki: -shakes head- nope, whining over having to write about mai

Mai: HEY! IAM NOT THAT BAD!

ssjx7squall: -mumbles- yes you are...

-everyone sweatdrops-

shizuru: -appears of nowhere and embraces squall- oh squal -sing song voice-

ssjx7squall: what?

shizuru: -whispers- if you want to whine or be emo, do it as you please however improve my relationship with natsuki first or else...

-ssjx7quall at 12:15 had a heart attack, time of dead: 12:30-

natsuki: SHIZURU YOU KILLED THE AUTHOR!

shizuru: but i can revive too -smirks- kiyohime...

-ssjx7squall heart starts beating irregularly but is alive at 12:35-

ssjx7squall: i think im going to write something -goes to room and puts a sign of 'YOU ARE DEAD IF YOU DARE DISTURB ME!'

natsuki: -sweatdrop- sometimes i wonder what makes me love you so much...

shiznats fan: HER HOT TEASE AND LOOK! THOSE DAMN RED EYES! THAT DAMN SMILE!

THANK YOU Raine you own on minifeeds since i am humor retarded.

A/N: Thanx again Rainee for the minfeeds. Yes i know its a bad chapter the worst so far, in fact i know how bad it is so dont send bad reviews on this one lol. This was another chapter i wrote to get it out of the way so it of course sucked. The next chapter WILL have shiznat but without them being together, thats still gonna be a while sorry and i am still trying to figure out how i am going to do half of it. the only thing i have left to say is all you authors i have alerted stories on better damn well hurry up with their updates lol lates for now guys sorry fort he crappy chapter.

ssjx7squall


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Well wow 3665 words, and thats with out notes, making this the longest chapter i have EVER written ). Hope you enjoy it guys, with the way things are goin it could be some time before i get to write anything for this story for a while.

And finally Review notes

silverstri: Well sorry i didnt update sooner but i hope this chapter makes up for it. I am really please you think Natsuki is really in character, im workin really hard to make it so

shamnic demonator: Im really glad you think so : )

uwiechan: Well plenty of shizuru in this chapter for you : ) and a long chapter at that. Hee hee i dont think any of us will ever be able to take shizuru's mind off natsuki (points like evil monkey from family guy at all the Shizuru/nao fics) but good luck hee hee tho i pray for you if natsuki finds out

rainee-chan: I see you posted a story i havent been able to read it yet since im trying to get alot of ideas out right now and my time is limited but i will, hope you enjoy this chapter and as always THANK you for doing my omake's for me

EisWulf: I always feel sorry for them...

without further ado, the long awaited chapter that actually gets the story moving and FINALLY has our two favorites in it

ssjxsquall

* * *

Shizuru wasn't sure how she did it, but for the first time in days she was up and about in her apartment. It had taken all her willpower to push her self up from the bed that afternoon, and once she was standing she couldn't believe she made it up.

Her apartment was in complete darkness except for weak rays of light shining through the blinds in her bedroom window. She sighed slightly and began to stretch looking around her bedroom as if seeing it for the first time.

The fact is Shizuru had not gotten up from her bed in two weeks except to go to the bathroom and eat pitiful excuses for meals. She had found that if she ate too much she would be sick within the hour and have to make a mad dash to the bathroom to empty her stomach contents.

What she saw when she looked around her room nearly sent her back to bed. Since she had been in bed, she hadn't unpacked anything at all and the only furniture that was in her room was her bed, her night stand, and the small stool she had put next to her bed. Sitting on top of the stool was Natsuki's helmet, illuminated by the light leaking through the blinds.

Covering her mouth with her hand and catching a sob in her throat, Shizuru tore her eyes away from the helmet and ran to the bathroom. She started the water to the shower and quickly got undressed. She then jumped into the shower, not noticing that the water was still freezing cold.

She soon found her self hyperventilating and had to support her self with her arm against the wall. _I can do this. I can do this…_

She forced her self up and proceeded to wash her self. Her moves were done almost mechanically, practiced. Things done out of necessity rather than any form of desire to get them done.

Stepping out of the shower she caught sight of her self in the mirror. What she saw was not the Shizuru Fujino that had once been. Her hair was sticking out in different directions giving her a haggard look, dark rings had formed underneath her eyes making it look as if she hadn't had a good nights sleep in quite a while, which she thought with a grimace, she hadn't. Her skin had grown pale and she had become unhealthily thin, since her apatite had been close to non-existent.

What had changed the most though were her eyes. Once a rich red color they were now pale, and lifeless. Devoid of all emotion and feeling, they gave no hint that there was a person behind the dead irises. Shizuru almost laughed. If people claimed she wore a mask before she could only wonder what they would say now.

After drying her self she returned to her bed room, making a point to not so much as glance at the helmet sitting in the middle of the room. Searching through her closet for clothes to wear, her actions quickened with each passing second. She needed to get out of the room and away from the helmet. From **her** helmet.

Almost running out of the room once she was dressed she supported leaned against the wall in the hallway panting. _I can't do this…_

Shizuru turned so her back was against the wall and slid down to the floor her face in her hands. _Why couldn't I have just died? Why couldn't she have just come back and I stayed dead? She could have been happy then. I could have stopped hurting her._ A sob escaped her throat. _She wouldn't have to go through this pain. I wouldn't have to go through this pain._

Tears began to stream down her cheeks. _No that's not what I want. This would all be bearable if I could just see her face…_ _Why couldn't I have been happy just being friends?_ Pulling her knees to her chest she buried her face between them. "Natsuki…"

* * *

Not knowing how she to do it, Shizuru managed to drag her self from the hallway and into the kitchen. Finding that her stomach start to churn when ever she thought of food she settled on just having a cup of tea.

Sitting at the table in the dining room she once again found her self staring out the nearby window. Clouds covered the sky, not the kind that promised rain; the kind that would block out the sun and make the day dreary and lifeless. It was absolutely still and stagnant outside, completely dead.

Shizuru found that her mind drifted off into nothingness as she stared out the window. _How was I in bed? I'm sure the university heads are furious with me at this point; I haven't even answered the phone. They'll probably reconsider their offer to let me start early._

What she didn't want to admit to her self was that she hoped they would. She really didn't think she was capable of doing anything at this point. She was so distraught and tired. Despite the fact that she had not left her bed in weeks, she felt as if she hadn't slept at all during that period. She wanted nothing more than to just be able to curl up and die. Well there was one thing she wanted more.

The sound of glass breaking snapped Shizuru out of her thoughts and she looked down at her hand. Not realizing it she had been tightening her grip on her cup until it broke from the pressure. She just stared at the shards of glass that littered the table top and that had pierced her hand. The scalding hot tea pooled on the table under her hand, some running off the edge making dripping noises as drops fell to floor.

Shizuru just stared at this, wanting nothing more than to laugh hysterically and cry at the same time. She didn't feel anything. Not the pain of the glass in her hand. Not the burning of the hot tea that her palm down rested in. Nothing.

She would have continued to stare at the broken cup for a while longer but a knock at the door brought her to her senses. Her mind devoid of thought she made her way to the kitchen sink, pulled out the pieces of glass and quickly washed her hand. Bringing it up to eye level she saw that it was an angry red where she had burned herself, and drops of blood were beginning to form from the wounds she had just cleaned. Sighing she ran her hand under the water one more time before making her way to the front door.

Not really knowing who to expect, and not really caring about her appearance she opened it.

* * *

Mai had finally found the apartment complex Reito had told her Shizuru was staying at. _I hope she's home._ She thought before running to the rows of doors to find the right one. Holding the piece of paper Reito had given her in front of her as she compared the number on it to the numbers on the doors she passed.

Finally stopping in front of a door whose number looked familiar she looked back down at the paper, then back at the door again. _This is it…_

Sighing, she stood directly in front of the door, raised her hand and knocked. A few moments passed and… nothing. She looked back down at the paper. The number was the same as the one on the door. _I hope he was right._

She raised her hand again about to knock when she heard the door opening.

"Ka- Kaichou…"

What ever Mai had been expecting, it hadn't been this. The woman in front of her was just barely recognizable as the once student council president Mai had known. Her hair was a mess, going off in different directions looking as if it hadn't been brushed in weeks. Her skin was pale and she looked thinner than Mai had ever seen anyone look.

"Tokiha-san…" It took a moment for Mai to realize that the woman had spoken. Her voice was low and it sounded tired and ragged, as if the woman barely had the energy to speak. Looking up to meet the woman's eyes Mai nearly gasped when they made eye contact.

Dark rings lined the Kaichou's tired eyes. That wasn't what made Mai gasp, it was the eyes themselves. They had a far off lost look, as if Shizuru were lost in thought. Sadness, desperation and exhaustion were hidden behind something bordering on… Mai couldn't think of the word but the woman in front of her appeared… broken.

"Would you like to come inside?" Mai was snapped from her thoughts when she realized Shizuru had spoken to her. The older girl had backed away slightly from the doorway giving Mai room to enter, a tired look on her face.

"Uh… uh sure." Mai quickly said entering the dark apartment.

Looking around she saw quite a few unpacked boxes spread through out the room. _Hasn't she been here a while?_

Hearing the door close behind her she turned to see Shizuru walking into the next room. "I was just having some tea, would you like some?"

"Uh… yes please." Mai quickly said following the Kaichou into the kitchen. She just couldn't get over the change of the woman in front of her. She couldn't think of anything that could cause the always elegant and beautiful woman to be in the state she was in now. _It's almost like Natsu…_

Mai gasped at her realization and quickly covered her mouth hoping she had not been heard. Shizuru gave no sign that she had heard Mai as she entered the kitchen.

"You may take a seat at the table; I just need to reheat the tea."

"Th…Thank you." Mai said, taking a seat at the small table. After sitting she couldn't help but notice the broken tea cup across the table. Shards of glass were strewn about and green tea was still dripping down the edge of the table.

_What happened?_

"Here you go Tokiha-san." Mai hadn't even realized Shizuru had entered the room until the woman placed a steaming cup of tea in front of her.

"Thank you Kaichou-sama." Mai said as Shizuru walked over the other side of the table and sat down, her own cup in her hands.

Mai blinked. Shizuru hadn't so much as glanced at the broken mess that was just a few inches from her right hand. About to comment on this Mai opened her mouth to speak but Shizuru beat her too it.

"Now, what did you come here today for Tokiha-san?" Shizuru asked, bringing her cup of tea to her lips.

"Uh… I came for…" Now that she was here Mai didn't have the slightest clue on how to approach the subject with Shizuru.

"Um, I came to ask why you left?" she quickly said, not really thinking.

Expecting some kind of tease or reaction out of the older girl Mai was shocked when Shizuru merely closed her eyes as she set down her tea cup. "I was offered a full scholarship to a nearby university. And because they felt that I was an exceptional student that I could start early; they provided me with this apartment so I could be closer to school and so I moved out here."

"Oh…" Mai said. Staring into her cup and the steam rising from it she slowly spun the cup trying to think of how to approach her real questions. _Why didn't you tell anyone? Especially Natsuki..._

"Um, Kaichou?" she timidly began, looking across the table.

"Yes?"

"Did… Did something happen between you and Natsuki?"

You could have heard a pin drop. The silence was so sick Mai thought she was going to suffocate in it. As soon as she had said that, it seemed like miles suddenly stretched between her and Shizuru. Walls were erected at each mile to make it even more impossible for anyone to get near.

There was no visible change in Shizuru's expression but the tension in the air was evidence that Mai had struck a chord.

"Why do you ask Tokiha-san?" Mai jumped when she heard Shizuru speak. The other woman still had her eyes closed and her head bowed slightly but Mai knew that she was not nearly as calm as she appeared.

"Be… Because Natsuki has been different lately. She has been getting in fights, and she is pushing everyone away. It's almost like…" Mai stopped trying to think of how to proceed. "Like how she was before the festival."

Shizuru visibly tensed at the mention of the festival. Mai had wanted to avoid bringing it up knowing that something serious had happened between Natsuki and her but she couldn't think of a better description.

"But its worse…" she continued. "She isn't letting anyone talk to her at all. And… And…" Mai was almost scared of the reaction this was going to bring. "I think she's hurt."

Shizuru's head snapped up immediately. "Hurt? How?" she quickly questioned, anger and fear evident in her voice and in her eyes.

Mai lowered her head afraid to meet those blood red eyes that seemed to almost glow in the semi-darkness of the dimly lit dining area.

"She came to school a few weeks ago and she was limping, like her leg was hurt. And…And her hands are always cut up now. She always has bandages over her hands and they are always red."

Mai heard as slight scraping sound and she looked up a little to see that Shizuru had her hands clenched in fists. Her knuckles were white and… _What happened to her hand!?_ Her right hand was an angry red and blood was dripping out between the clenched fingers.

Looking up at Shizuru Mai was stunned by what she saw. There was complete desperation in woman's eyes. Fear and sadness shone through and Shizuru began to tremble. "Kaichou?"

Mai had never seen so many emotions from the woman in front of her and she had no idea as to how to react. It was like a rock had suddenly started crying I front of her; she didn't even know how to approach comforting the broken woman before her.

"Did… did you guys have a fight?"

As soon as Mai said those words all the emotion that had been leaking out from Shizuru's eyes vanished and was once again replaced by the empty dead pools she had seen when she first arrived. Her hands now laid flat on the table on either side of her tea cup.

"I left to help her. She is better off without me." Shizuru said. It sounded like she was talking to her self, trying to convince her self more than anything.

Mai stood up the chair out behind her and she nearly yelled at the woman across from her. "What! How could you do that to her?!"

Shizuru seemed to snap out of her thoughts as she looked up at Mai, her eyes still empty and dead when she spoke, "Do not presume to judge my actions Tokiha-san. You do not understand the situation."

Mai was stunned. _How could she do this!?_ "She is torn up inside right now, out getting hurt doing god knows what and your saying it's for her own good?!" she screamed.

Shizuru took a sip from her tea unperturbed. "Please leave now Tokiha-san."

Mai stood there with her jaw open. _What is wrong with her? I… I…_

Frustrated Mai turned to leave but before she left she looked back at Shizuru. "You probably did the worst thing anyone could do to Natsuki, Shizuru. You left her and…" Disgusted Mai couldn't even finish. Shaking her head she left the apartment.

* * *

When she heard the door click closed, Shizuru slumped in her chair, all her walls collapsing around her. _She's right._ The tears were finally let lose as despair and shame set in. She leaned over on the table burying her head in her arms, not caring about the pieces of glass cutting into her skin or the now cold tea seeping into her clothes. _Natsuki… I'm so sorry._

* * *

Natsuki sneezed again. She'd been sneezing for the past twenty minutes. _Probably getting sick…_ she idly thought as she zoomed down the street.

She'd been driving around for about three hours now finding a small bit of peace on the road. Back in the days when she had been investigating her mothers death she did this a lot, finding comfort in the emptiness around her. Now though she found that not even this helped clear her head completely, fore someone kept intruding on her thoughts.

Luckily, she had been able to hold back tears each time Shizuru began to intrude on her thoughts while she was driving, but it was a constant battle to keep the other girl completely blocked out. She found that she ended up fighting the road rather than riding it to try to find the peace she once did. Challenging others to try and hit her, to try and block her path, she would always swerve around them at high speeds, cutting others off a lot closer than she ever would have before.

Already out running two cops in the past few weeks she almost wanted to have another chase her right now. Natsuki really wanted to crash badly right now. To just take a turn to fast and slide off the edge knocking out the guard railing and fall to her death. For some idiot in a car to not see her one time and side swipe her so she would just go flying and crash into the asphalt that would knock the life out of her.

She found a morbid sense of peace at thoughts of someone killing her. Anything to get rid of the burning in her chest.

"NO!!" She cried, pulling back on the throttle, trying to outrun the emotions that were starting to creep up on her. This was a common occurrence and one that had almost gotten her killed a few times already. Despite all her death wishes, Natsuki was still an exceptional rider and her instincts while on her bike were second to none. She was able to take turns at speeds no professional racer would ever think of doing. She could swerve in and out of traffic at high speeds like there was no one on the road, getting inches from other vehicles.

"Stay the fuck out of my head!" She screamed again, images of Shizuru flashing through her head. Tears began to leak out of her eyes and she growled in frustration. Seeing a red light in front of her she decided to stop.

Slamming her visor up she roughly wiped the moisture away from her eyes. "Stop! Stop damn it!" She began to beat the gas tank in front of her with her fists, willing the tears to stop falling.

Leaning over she began to bang her helmeted head against the tank. "Please… Please just stop." Finally giving up she just put all her weight over the front of her bike and broke down and cried.

"I've lost her… My best friend…" When she said this she hit her head on the bike again. "The only person who has ever really loved me, the only one who actually cared about me." She began sobbing violently.

"Of course she would move on. I hurt her to much." _I completely ignored her feelings. Why am I so scared!?_ She growled and began pounding on the handle bars. _It's not her I'm scared of, its how I feel. Everyone I have ever cared for has abandoned me. Even her._

With that she let out a long wail and fell over the front of her bike once again. Thunder rolled over head and rain drops began to fall.

_Except this time it's my fault. I pushed her away. Shizuru I love you so damn much._ Natsuki hadn't even noticed what she mentally said to her self. Lightning arced across the sky and the rain intensified.

A van had pulled up behind Natsuki and when the light turned green and she hadn't moved the driver hit his horn.

Hearing the horn behind her Natsuki snapped up. Normally she would have been embarrassed at being caught in such a state but right now she didn't care. Seeing that the light was green she slammed down her visor, popped the bike into first and accelerated faster than any car had ever dreamed of.

She began shivering as she drove down the narrow city streets constantly fighting the urge to break down and cry. _Must… get… home…_

Coming up on another intersection she heard a loud crack that sounded nothing like thunder when all of sudden something hit her in the back of the head. A sudden pain spread throughout the center of the back of her head as she was thrown headfirst over her bike onto rough asphalt in the middle of the intersection.

Her bike when flying across the road as she went skidding down in an opposite direction her leathers beginning to tear. Fighting unconsciousness it suddenly struck her how similar this was to just a few weeks ago, except this time she didn't really care what happened to her.

As her momentum carried her across the street she hit a curb which sent her flying into a nearby pole. All the air was snapped from her lungs and her vision began to go black as she slid back down to the asphalt.

Her head eye level with the street the last thing she saw before her vision finally went black were black tires of some kind of vehicle coming to a stop in front of her, the sound of screeching tires ringing in her ears.

Taking one last deep breath blackness full enveloped her world.

_Shizuru…_

_

* * *

_

A/N: Wow i really didnt think id be done with this tonight but at 4:09 im finished. Alot of work actually went into this chapter believe it or not, I'm not the greatest at dialouge and as you all know ihate Mai so that is that. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and that all the people who started this story are still with it, bring onthe reveiws because my last story only got 2 and i put alot into that one : (

Oh and how could we forget, raine-chans omake:

Mai: -sigh- squall is so mean -sigh-

ssjx7squall: hey! i am not, be grateful

mai: how? when you have admitting hating to write and blah blah and i wont even be able to help natsuki so much

ssjx7squall: well...i just dont like you -pouts- besides be happy you are the main character in sunrise's work. So DONT WHINE HERE!

Mai: T.T still

ssjx7squall: -eye twitching- you feel bad about my fic lacking of you? -shoves script- READ THIS ONE! IT BARELY MENTIONS YOU!

Mai: OH MY WHAT THE -faints-

ssjx7squall: -sweatdrop- wow...

Mikoto: MAI! MAI! -ANGRY EYES- SQUAL

ssjx7squall: Mikoto! wait!

Mikoto: YOU KILLED -faints-

ssjx7squall: Mikoto? O.O

Mikoto: food...mikoto...needs food

End

Ok i wont bore you with anymore emo notes on my personal life, just hope you enjoyed it and hope to be able to upload another chapter soon

ssjx7squall


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: I'll keep my notes short. First off want to say sorry it took so long, but i rewrote this chapter twice and so far it is the longest chapter I've ever written. Second off, it is very wordy and gives a lot of background info on things, not much shiznat unfortunatly. To you the truth, while Shiznat is the main focus of this story, there is ALOT more going into it then just those two, but i promise you they are the center, it is just going to take a few more chapters before they are together again ok? sorry bout that guys.

BGirlBlue: hee hee no Mai will not get them back together. I kinda feel that that plot move is very overused at this point so im tryin to do a lil diff and i hope you will like it when it gets there. And i glad that you feel what they are, i sometimes think i over do it a bit. Sorry it took so long to update

SpinningRose: Ya i am kind of an ass when it comes to these two and no shes not dead, but i said from the begining that these two chars are gonna go through hell, but they WILL come out the other side. And im sorry about the typos, i honestly cant stand rereading what i write sorry : ( and i agree with you natsuki is just clueless, and an emotional cowerd...but thats this guys opinion

EisWulf: Agreed, i wish i knew what author it is and the name of the story but they do a damn good job about rewriting the Mai Hime series, in which the main characters are shizuru and Natsuki, send me a PM some time and ill give you the link, by far one of the best written and most enjoyable stories on this site though the author takes longer to update than me.

Sylverlyf: BINGO!!! lol your the only one who got it ; )

uwiechan: No i havent abandoned you, my personal life has just been ...well hell, had two funerals to go to in the past month and another i should have, beyond that and a short attempt at being an alcoholic again writing and reviewing has been a PIA. Hee hee and i dont think ANYONE will ever be able to steal shizuru from Natsuki : )

rainee-chan: Hope you like this chapter : )

lindred: Well, she tries...

chum-sa: ya i always seem to be making her crash, im trying to come up with an omake idea for it but those really arent my expertise. Truth is this is mostly gonna be an angsty story until just about the very end : ( sorry, but all the pain they will go through will make it that much better at the end...right?

To everyone else thanx for reviewing and i apologize on the time.

ssjx7squall

Tell me if you want me to stop doing these replies, i get the feeling i ramble to much on my A/Ns...

Also I have a poll up, im takin the results seriously as well, and it will determine what i do when it comes to updating my stories

* * *

It had taken a while but Shizuru finally managed to calm her self down enough to stop crying. Sitting up in her chair she stared down at her bloodied hand. Her thoughts were jumbled, each fighting for dominance in her mind, but each crying out one thing. Natsuki. 

It was then that she reached a decision. Pushing the chair beneath her out, she slowly stood, collecting the cups on the table and taking them into the kitchen.

_I will have to see her. If what Tokiha-san san says is true, then Natsuki…_

Shizuru quickly shut her eyes before angrily slamming her open palms down on the kitchen counter. _Why? Why does she have this affect on me? _Tears were forming at the corners of her eyes again. _I don't know if I can see her. Not like this. _

She stood there in the dark kitchen for a while, leaning against the counter fighting with her self. At this point she really didn't know if it would be better if she saw Natsuki or not. She knew she really wanted to see the blue haired girl but with the state she was in lately, she honestly didn't know if she could handle it. The truth was she was more worried about Natsuki's reaction more than anything. After the fight that they had had and what Mai had said about her, Shizuru wanted nothing more than to apologize to Natsuki, but knowing her she probably had shut out the world at this point.

Her grip on the edge of the counter tightening she clenched her teeth. _All I ever do is hurt her!_ Before she knew what she was doing, she brought her injured fist down onto the counter. There was a loud crash and the sound of splintering wood as she nearly fell face first onto the counter.

Eyes wide with shock and disbelief she looked down at her hand which was now inside the cabinet that was below the counter. Slowly pulling her hand out, she looked down at the hole that was now in the counter. _How…_

It was as if someone had taken a hammer and slammed it down on the hard wood counter. Splinters jutted out from the sides of the hole while the remnants of what had filled said hole, dangled by a few slivers into the dark cabinet below.

Turning her attention to her hand Shizuru, saw that it wasn't so much as bruised from the impact. _There- There is just no way._ Rushing over to the sink she quickly began to wash away the dried blood that coated her hand. Scrubbing furiously she realized with a shock that her knuckles weren't even red. Surely they must be bruised at the **very** least from such a hit? There weren't even any splinters in her forearm, let alone her hand from going through the wood. For the second time she thought, "_How?" _

Holding her arm out in front of her she made her way back into the dining room, for the first time in weeks her thoughts no longer on Natsuki. She jumped slightly as a loud crash over head brought her to her senses. Looking out the window near the table she saw that a heavy rain had begun to fall on the world outside. _Raining again…._

Sighing slightly she looked at her arm once more before turning her back on the window and going back into the kitchen. Returning to the room with a dust pan and a towel she began to clean up the mess that she had made on the table and floor. Feeling annoyed with her self again for letting herself get so distraught she threw the towel into the sink and merely set the dust pan next to the trash can.

Scoffing at herself slightly she made her way back to the table. _Only you Natsuki, could make me act like this…_ Taking her seat again, she placed her elbow on the table and rested her chin on the butt of her wrist as she stared out into the rain. _Only you…_

She stayed like this for a time, loosing her self in memories of happier times. When she and Natsuki had merely been friends. How they had met. How they had gotten to know each other better. She thought about all the times she had seen the girl smile. That sweet smile that was so innocent and warm that it belied the harsh past the girl who wore it had lived through.

Shizuru knew that Natsuki took some pride in the fact that she was always able to bring out a genuine smile from her, but what Natsuki didn't know was that Shizuru felt the same about her. Natsuki never smiled, but when she did Shizuru just lost her self in the simple joy the girl showed. The warmth in her eyes seemed to always find a way to Shizuru's chest making her feel warm and a sensation beyond elation. While all of Natsuki's nicknames gave reference to ice, the truth was the girl was the warmest kindest person around.

It was Shizuru who was made of ice. It was her who had used the guise of friendship to get closer to the other girl. All the time feeding off the other's pain and sorrow, relishing the moments where she would be able to provide comfort to the other. That was the truth of it. No matter how many times she tried to justify her actions to her self the fact of the matter is, she is a parasite. The events of the Carnival gave more than enough evidence for that.

Using the betrayal Natsuki felt, she moved in. Pretending to be a friend, pretending to help she had swooped in to take advantage of Natsuki's distraught state. At the time she thought she was being a good friend, that she was doing all she could for the one she cared for the most. Never had she imagined that she would lose control like she did. In retrospect she knew she should have distanced herself completely from Natsuki the moment she felt the slightest bit of temptation, but she had been weak. The truth is, she was gave in and fed Natsuki more betrayal from the hands of the one person she should have always been able to trust.

No matter how many times she tried though, she could never pin point the one moment where she could have stopped herself. She knew exactly where she **should** have, but when it came to Natsuki she had no willpower. Seeing the girl sleeping so soundly that day by the garden, she was overcome with all the emotion she felt for the girl. She wanted nothing more than to comfort the girl or so she had thought before she kissed her. From that moment on she began to slip into a deep dark ocean that she never thought she would be able to get out of.

But she had. Not by her self no, she had been much too weak to do it by herself. It was the very person who she had betrayed who saved her. Natsuki, being the sweet, caring girl she was pulled her out of that ocean she was drowning in. _And she did more than that._

Afterwards, Natsuki was with her as much as possible. The girl always found an excuse to be near Shizuru. Of course Shizuru knew that Natsuki was forcing herself, bearing with all the awkwardness and fear she must feel near her.

Shizuru buried her face into her hands fighting off tears once again.

_How can I face her? After all she has done for me I turned my back on her. I pushed her away. She was only trying to help me and I refused her help._

It was at this moment that she felt a sharp pain lance through her chest. She fell forward on the table gasping for air. She had experienced pain in her chest many times the past week but this was a great deal stronger. It felt like something was pulling at her, wanting her to move towards something. Fear filled her as some part of her mind began to scream out warning signals.

Fighting her way to her feet she tried desperately to catch her breath. "Natsuki!" She didn't know how but she knew something was terribly wrong and that Natsuki was in trouble. Not thinking for a minute how odd the event that just happened was she quickly ran to her room to grab her car keys. Not thinking for a minute about her state of dress or the rain outside into the storm, leaving her apartment for the first time in weeks.

* * *

Smith let out a long drawn out breath as he watched the rain fall outside the tall glass windows. Leaning back in his tall leather chair, legs up on the desk in front of him, arms folded behind his head he drifted off into thought, a slight frown on his face. 

Things were progressing much faster than he had planned. Oh everything was still well within the realm of his control but he had not expected such a blatant and sloppy move from his opponent so soon.

Of course he was aware of the 'attack' on Natsuki but that wasn't what was bothering him. The fact that she had been attacked in public so openly was the issue. For one this called into question the reliability of his men who were supposed to watching her. Oh they had brought her in quite safely afterwards, but the real pressing matter was that they had not, or **would** not prevent it.

Yes, there were definitely a few trust issues. Another matter, smaller but no less annoying was how these 'men' had gotten into the country and set up shop without his knowledge. Of course there was no way he could cover all entry points into Japan, both legal and illegal, but he should still have been informed of their expected arrival.

Another matter of concern was where and how they were operating. How they were receiving orders, not to mention supplies and intel. He controlled just about all the illegal methods of receiving the items needed to run such and operation in Japan and he would definitely know of any questionable requests.

All these problems in the end lead to an annoying result. One that could be dealt with in time but still annoying. The only way anyone could have made such a move that was obviously a call out, was if a relatively large group of people in his organization were working with his brother.

He scoffed slightly before putting his feet down and turning around to face his desk. There was another possibility, one that would be much more difficult to deal with if it turned out to be the reason. The council or a few members of it at least were in on it.

The idea that it was the entire council seemed a bit farfetched though. Sure they didn't really like him to much, he held to much power for them to not be a little weary of him, but the fact is they were where they were because of him. After their bungling of the Hime Incident and their orders to him during that time that he followed against his better judgment he stood up to them afterwards. He had demanded that they allow him certain powers so that he could regain the company's status. After hearing him out they reluctantly agreed. It had taken a lot of work but he had been able to replace the now extinct First District's position at the top of Japan's most powerful companies.

Sears was now the wealthiest and strongest company in this hemisphere. Sure it's roots were still in America where the Council was, but here in Japan it had complete control. And it was all thanks to him.

He hadn't been a fool though. He knew that the moment the Council could dispose of him and put someone more, 'amenable' to their orders in his place. So when he began to build up the company he made sure that it would not run without him in place. Now he was probably the wealthiest and most feared man in the world, fore even the Council were apprehensive in dealing with him.

But they had the resources and knowledge to counteract most of his security measures. '_And bank accounts.'_ He thought grudgingly.

The fact **someone** had been able to infiltrate his company was slightly disturbing though. Sure it was going to happen, and there was no way to catch every single mole that decided to burrow into his lawn, but he had always known when it was going to happen and who was doing the burrowing. After all, he paid good money to know what was going on in his own company. It was sad but true that that had to be done and he would be a fool not to. Planting counter intelligence was another matter.

_I really don't know how I ended up like this. This was part of the reason I left-_

A knock at the door brought him from his dark thoughts. _Now what…._ Sighing he turned his head back the storm outside. "Come in Takeda."

The sound of creaking doors preceded the annoying young man who entered.

"Sir. I have a report-"

He was silenced by Smith's raised hand. Without looking over at the man he spoke, "How many times do I have to say 'Do. Not. Call. Me. Sir.'"

The color from Takeda's face drained slightly as he recalled his employer's early threat to make him disappear off the face of the earth if he referred to him as Sir again.

"I- I'm sorry Sir- I mean, Mr. Smith."

"Very good." Smith said as he turned his attention towards the man in front of him. "Now what did you want?"

Takeda let out an audible breath of relief before bringing up the clipboard he was carrying and began to read over the notes on it.

"Natsuki Kuga was shot in the back of the head while riding her motorcycle tonight at-"

"I don't need a news report Takeda, get to the point." Smith said slightly annoyed. Turning his head back to the storm outside he listened to Takeda splutter and slowly start up again.

"Uh- uh- she was not seriously injured. It was a small round from a pistol shot at a great distance that didn't even penetrate her helmet. Most of her injuries were sustained from the subsequent crash that followed. It- it really makes no sense Sir- ah I mean Mr. Smith."

Smith sighed and said nothing. _The rain is really relaxing. _He thought idly as he waited for Takeda to ask the question he knew the boy wanted answered. After a few moments of silence, in which the only noise was from the rain outside and the occasional thunderclap Smith sighed again. _He's not going to ask…_

Without turning his head he spoke. "It's quite obvious as to what one of their intentions was **not.**"

"Sir?" The color drained once again from Takeda's face as he realized that he had once again called Smith sir.

Smith ignored the young man's use of the forbidden word and answered him. "They quite obviously didn't want her dead. As to why they took the chance in using a pistol, at night, from a long way away, you should be able to think of the answer to that if you try. Keep in mind that this 'incident' is a message and not so much a move on the girl."

Takeda thought for a few moments before answering. "They wanted to let us know that they weren't worried about killing her?"

"Bingo." Smith said. "Oh, and next time you answer, make it a statement and not a question. There is very little more annoying than answers that are questions."

"Ye- Yes sir- I mean Mr. Smith."

Turning his attention once more to Takeda, Smith rested his head on the palm of his hand. "What did the doctors say? When will she be conscious?"

Takeda held up his clip board once again and began looking through the papers on it. After a few moments he found the one he wanted. Taking into account the extent of her wounds, and that she was shot in the head, they say a week. That is of course considering her rege-"

"Ha! I give her three days." Smith laughed and turned his back to the window. Those damn doctors, they always underestimated people. Granted Natsuki's current mental state would hinder her recovery some, but that's why he said three days instead of one.

"Have you increased security on the others?" he questioned Takeda.

"No, sir I was waiting on your order."

Smith sighed and looked Takeda straight in the eyes, pinning the man where he stood. Takeda swore those eyes were piercing right through him. They were the eyes of a hawk watching its prey. A **very **hungry hawk.

"When something so obvious should be done, I expect you to take care of it. You're supposed to make my job easier remember? Tell me you have done it of course but do it."

"Ye- Yes sir- Mr. Smith. I'll increase security on all-"

"Not on all." Smith said raising his hand slightly. "There's no need. Double it on Fujino, the two young red heads and that cat girl. Post some men on all the others who don't have anyone, and make it to **outsiders** that they are there." _Hopefully that will draw some attention away from the others._ "Have assault squads ready on the first few I mentioned at all times. I want them ready for a fight, and I want them to be ready to bring the subjects in at a moments notice."

"Yes Mr. Smith." Takeda said quickly jotting down everything his boss had said.

"And Takeda, you better damn well be disposing of all those notes once you are done with them."

"I- I am." Takeda stuttered. "Oh, sir?" he apparently had forgotten his earlier worries of using the word. "According to our men, Fujino left her apartment in quite a rush just shortly after Kuga was shot. She is still driving around, but she seems to be headed towards the intersection it happened at."

Smith was taken aback by this news. So far this was just about the only thing that had surprised him that Takeda had said. _They are progressing quite a bit faster than I expected…_

"I want a sweep of the intersection; I don't want ANYONE in that area who can do anything. And make sure it is done discreetly; I don't want to attract attention but if there is another message to be sent I want a reply ready immediately. Now go."

"Yes sir." Takeda said before turning around and quickly heading toward the double doors.

Smith was about to put his feet back on the desk before a thought struck him. "Oh Takeda." He called out.

Takeda stopped in his tracks, and slowly turned, terror evident on his face.

"Is there any sign of the boy?"

Surprise and relief flashed across Takeda's face as he realized he wasn't going to be erased. "No sir. Not yet. Our men are still looking but there is still no trace of him."

No emotion showed on Smith's face as to whether or not he was pleased with his information. Leaning back in his chair he said. "Very well."

Takeda sighed before turning again to leave.

"Oh Takeda."

The boy froze once again, wondering what the problem could be this time.

"Don't call me sir." Smith said a small smile on his face as Takeda began spluttering apologies as he hurried out of the room.

* * *

Shizuru stopped her car on the side of the road. She had been driving her hours seemingly guided by some unseen force to this area. The rain had picked up in intensity and had seemed to follow her from her apartment to this intersection. 

Getting out of the car and ignoring the rain that soaked through her thin cloths into her skin she made her way out into the intersection. She really didn't know what it was but she felt drawn to this place, and she knew, she was certain, it had something to do with Natsuki.

The rain was coming down in thick sheets, distorting her vision and making it hard for her to see just a few feet in front of her. Glancing around, she saw no car lights, and made her way over to a corner where there stood one lone street light.

Glancing around she took in the area as best she could. It was a standard four way intersection, each street had lights that would turn red and green to tell cars to stop or go. Nothing was out of place, but she just had the feeling that there was **something.**

Panic seized her again as she realized Natsuki could have been in an accident with another car. Running out into the intersection she began to look for skid marks left by tires but stopped as she realized that the rain would have washed such things away by now. She then began to look around for broken glass or plastic, knowing that the faring on Natsuki's bike would surely have cracked if there had been any forceful impact.

She searched for a while, arms wrapped around her body fighting off the icy chill the rain brought to her near bear body. Panic and frustration grew in her the longer she searched and found nothing.

Getting back in her car she sat down and leaned her head against the steering wheel. "I guess I could check the hospitals." She said to no one in particular. "I could call Ma- no… She wouldn't talk to me."

Shizuru sighed and leaned back against her seat. Bringing her palms down over the top of the steering wheel in frustration she said, "What is it I'm missing?" All the time she had been here she knew that there was something, some sign that she was supposed to see. It annoyed her that she didn't understand this feeling or what it meant, all she knew was that it had something to do with Natsuki. She was nearly crying in frustration and worry over the possibility that Natsuki could be hurt and there was absolutely nothing she could do about it. That she could even be there for her if she **was** hurt. She felt completely helpless.

"Isn't this how it always is? I can never help her."

She leaned her head against the steering wheel again and sank deeper and deeper into despair. _I need to check the hospitals._ At this thought she raised her right hand to the ignition and began to turn it.

Just then the street light changed colors, catching her eye and she raised her head. Across the street she saw something that looked… 'odd'. Barely illuminated by the green light it looked almost as if a person was standing bent over across the street in front of her.

"Natsuki!" Shizuru said before quickly leaving her car, not bothering to close the door. She ran across the street towards the odd object. As she got closer she realized it wasn't a person but a pole, one of those had the held the crosswalk buttons. What was odd about it was that the pole was bent nearly in half as if hit with great force in the center.

Looking at it she was filled with worry. What scared her was once she had gotten close to the pole, the feeling of something pulling at her had vanished quickly and abruptly as if cut. This terrified her more than anything because it was if her connection with Natsuki had been cut.

Turning away she quickly ran to her car, hoping that Natsuki was alright.

* * *

Rain poured down as the man watched Shizuru from across the street. Managing to remain undetected by Smith's men he decided to take a look at his 'subject.' The woman who ran from one end of the street to the other appeared very unimpressive so far. The fact that she didn't even seem aware that she was being watched killed his mood slightly. He was told that was going to be a challenge. 

A few weeks ago he had received a message from the big German company, Schwarz seeking to hire him. He had done work for them before, they were an old company, much like the First District that had recently disappeared and the American based Sears Corporation that now seemed to have a hold here in Japan. Each company dealt quite a bit in the black market and illegal trade of just about anything. In their respective regions they controlled the economic flow, as well as the political standings of the major politicians of the countries.

He had been slightly apprehensive in accepting the job. It wasn't so much that he felt he couldn't handle it, but more so that once you worked for one company, the others were out to get you. It had come as a surprise to him when he learned that First District had seemingly vanished into thin air, but he was relieved at the same time, after all it was one less threat to worry about. Although they had paid well…

Choosing to live in Japan, he had done most of his work with First District, that is until Sears moved in. They paid much better but the work was boring. The Smith fellow who ran the company didn't seem to need his services much as he preferred black mail and threats to… disposing of people. Although he did do that quite often, just not with the frequency First District did.

Recently he had heard that Schwarz was looking to move into Japan and was paying well for a way in. Using his contacts in Sears and the one Schwarz had already in place he managed to get the men in and get them what they needed.

His job wasn't complete yet. There was still the matter of this girl to attend to. While he had been warned that she was extremely dangerous and not to be underestimated he had his doubts. First of all, Schwarz had been very guarded with the information they supplied him about her. Frankly he could see why they had any interest at all, but hey it wasn't his job to question that.

Now all that was really left to do, was to wait for the signal to move in. They had told him it could be a while, and that he should keep his distance, but when it was this easy, why bother?

He watched as the girl got in her car and then ran back out again. He watched as she ran over to the pole that the Kuga girl had hit before the Sears men had picked her up. She stood there a while clutching her chest for some odd reason.

Squinting through the rain he saw that she looked terrified. _Does she know? No… There's no way._ He thought chuckling to himself.

Turning he began to walk away. "This is going to be a piece of cake." He said aloud. He really wasn't worried too much about Sears at this point. All his contacts inside assured him everything was going as planned and Schwarz had his back. Not that he would be worried anyways. He was Jason Schulze, the best hit-man in the world, and this was just another boring job.

* * *

A/N: Sorry if you guys dont like this kind of stuff, i realize it is a lil wordy and not all dealing with Shizuru and Natsuki. Thing is, im writing this one more like a book than my others, so alot more shall we say, structure is going into it than the others not to mention a lot more apprehension at the idea of screwin it up. Again sorry if this isnt your cup of tea, but shizuru and natsuki ARE the main focus even though right now it seems thats not the case i assure you pretty sure they are going to be together, tho im sorry to say the next chapter is going to be another very explination filled chapter, however, we get to see shizuru kick some ass : ) 

ssjx7squall

as always thanx for reading and i hope you enjoyed, critism more than welcomed


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Wow two chapters within one week of a chapter! Could this be a habbit? lol dont count on it. Btw im offically off pain meds so you can blame all the crappy writing of this chapter solely on me. Just so you know i see to be increasing my chapter size with each chapter, this is now the longest one i have ever written. Hope you like it. WARNING: The "F" word is used quite a bit in the last part of this chapter. There is also mutilation...just thought you should know, enjoy :)

NOTE: if anyone was interested in the story i told Eiswulf about its The Way We Are by jaded088 an absolutly AMAZING author who also has an otome story and just came out with another story tonight while i was writing this chapter. Go check her stuff out it is amazing. And PLEASE check out the poll on my profile.

chum-sa: I am sorry to say it wont be this chapter they get together and they will before the end. so to speak. And as for shizuru kicking some ass, you will have to read this chapter to find out.

Eiswulf: I fully agree with you there

lindred: I know even im wanting to kick my butt now for the lack of shiznat but i think all the fluff i have written in the past month has made up for it. And i hope this chapter and the next will fulfill my promise :)

uweichan: again sorry for makin you feel awkward but ya im fine. The only block i am facing on writing now is exaustion and story ideas colliding.

pri 815: lol glad you remember it :)

Ak 7 reveiws guy? Thats almost as bad as what i got on Alone, shit no one read that one. lol oh well i dont really care but that was a long chapter, oh well, without further ado chapter twelve of Abandonment.

ssjx7squall

* * *

Natsuki groaned as she slowly opened her eyes into a horribly bright light. Quickly shutting them in a futile attempt to block it out she tried to raise her hand in order to block it out but was immediately met with resistance and the sound of metal clinging against metal.

Eyes snapping open, she quickly sat up and looked down at her hands. Each of her wrists were handcuffed to the side bars of what appeared to be a hospital bed.

"What the fuck!" she yelled, repeatedly tugging at each of the handcuffs trying to get out of them. All she got were sore wrists.

Giving up she sighed and fell back onto the bed, gazing up at the light above her. It was only then that she realized how much her body hurt. If she could, she would have raised her hand to her head as it seemed to be the center of all the pain in her body. Experiencing quite possibly the most painful headache of her life she found it very easy to ignore the rest of the aches and pains in her body, except for the on in her back.

_What the hell happened? I was riding my bike, then…_ Nothing… She couldn't remember. Not a thing.

Growling in frustration she sat up and began to take in her surroundings. It looked like she was in a dark windowless room, the only light coming from the light in the ceiling directly above her head.

Looking down she saw that she was in a gown people usually wore when admitted to a hospital. _Where the hell am I? This doesn't look like any hospital I've ever been in._

She began looking for a way out of the handcuffs when she heard the sound of door opening somewhere across the room to the right followed by the sounds of someone talking.

"Why don't you wait out here? I don't think I'll need your- Oh! Good! You're awake."

Lunging at the shadow of the man entering the room, she was once again stopped by the handcuffs. "Who the hell are you! Why the hell am I- "

She stopped when the man stepped out of the shadows and into the ring of light surrounding her bed. "You?"

"Me." John Smith said smiling. Wearing his usual dark blue suit, he stood in front of her, hands folded behind his back and leaning forward slightly. "I'm glad you remember me."

A low growl emitted from the back of Natsuki's throat. "How could I forget."

Smith leaned straightened, a look of wonderment and surprise on his face. After a few moments he let out a loud "Oh!" as if he had just remembered something. "That business with your mother?" He raised a hand in front of him and shook it and his head before saying. "That really wasn't my doing. I assure you; your mother cared for you quite a bit. The organization I work had certain plans for you."

Natsuki was in shock. For one how could this man so off handedly say such things? Only recently had she really come to terms with the possibility that her mother had sold her off, and to just be told so plainly that something that had torn her up inside was a lie was… She could even think of the word.

"Now," he said turning his back to her and walking back into the shadows. "We have some talking to do." Natsuki heard a clicking sound before a lamp across from her was turned on, revealing a seated Smith leaning against a table.

Snarling Natsuki spat, "What the hell do you want from me?"

Smith seemed unperturbed by her outburst. In fact his smile just deepened, making Natsuki shiver. That smile never touched his eyes, vaguely reminding her of Shizuru. Except these eyes were cold and empty, devoid of any emotion. _Shizuru's were never cold._ She thought.

"Oh, quite a bit actually." He said leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "Nothing you can give me at the moment however. First off though, aren't you wondering how you got here?"

Giving up her fight with the handcuffs Natsuki leaned back against the bed. "I'm sure you had something to do with it." She said scowling.

"Technically? Yes." He chuckled leaning back into the chair. From the side of his chair be produced what appeared to be her bike helmet. Examining it he said, "Amazing what some plastic and a lot of Styrofoam will protect one against."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Natsuki snarled. She was getting tired of this man already.

Without raising his head he looked at her and smiled. Natsuki gasped, as he loosened his grip on the helmet it fell apart into two complete halves. A vertical 'crack' starting at the base of the back of the helmet to the front. Natsuki had never seen anything like it before.

"Wha- what the hell happened?" she stammered.

"To put it bluntly? You were shot." Rising from his chair, he made his way over to her hold the two pieces of the helmet in front of him. When he got next to her, he put the pieces back together. "See this?" He said, pointing to the small hole in the back of the helmet.

Awestruck she slowly nodded, not sure if she wanted to believe him or not.

"Well, a quarter of an inch more and we wouldn't be having this conversation." Letting the helmet fall back into two pieces, she saw that there was indeed a hole penetrating the back of the helmet almost all the way through.

"Here take it." Smith said offering the remnants of the helmet to her. Taking them she stared down at the hole disbelievingly. This wasn't possible.

"Who wants me dead?" she questioned. The only people she could think of who would were First District, but they were all dead. Shizuru had… _Shizuru took care of them._ She thought grimly.

"Oh quite a few people at this point I'm sure." Smith turned his back to her once more, making his way to the chair. "But for the sake of argument, does it really matter?" Sitting down he once again smiled at her. "Basically, what happened is you were shot while riding, you flipped over your bike and bounced off the concrete a few times before colliding with a steel pole. The pole is in bad shape I hear."

Now she knew he was lying. "There's no damn way. Look at me I don't have a scratch on me." Holding up her arms so he could see she turned them from side to side. Unfortunately when she began to turn her arms a sharp pain lanced from them up through her shoulders and to her back. She fought the urge to wince and pant, gritting her teeth to keep in the gasp she almost let out.

Smith wasn't fooled. Still wearing that obnoxious smile he leaned forward, "Well, no scratches…"

He began chuckling at Natsuki's snarl and leaned back in the chair. "I'm sure that you're still in quite a bit of pain at the moment despite all the pain killers we have you on. I had the machines removed for our little meeting; I didn't want them or you damaged. Wouldn't want you to go ripping out an I.V and waste a lot of good medication now would we."

Growling Natsuki looked down at her left arm and saw a small bandage on the inside of her forearm, just past her elbow. Looking back up, she glared at the man, "How do I know that you didn't just knock me out and do something to me?"

Smith looked slightly offended and surprised as he started waving his hand in the air. "Why would I ever do that? Your much to important to risk damaging. Although it would be interesting to see how far we could push you." He ended with a look of wonderment on his face and a far off look in his eyes. Shaking his head as if to get rid of thoughts he continued, "No I assure you, we had nothing to do with your little… accident."

"Why should I believe you, you've lied to me before why not now?" Natsuki said, still not convinced

Sighing, Smith sat back in his chair a bored expression on his face. "I could have the tapes brought in of the shooting but that would require bringing in a T.V., a VCR, and… Well it's really not worth it since it doesn't matter a whole lot of you believe me."

He began to watch her intently, "The truth of the matter is, you have increased healing abilities, far beyond that of any human. If I am correct you recovered relatively quickly after your last little bike crash a few weeks ago did you not?"

Natsuki's mouth was hanging open. "Yo- You-"

"Oh yes." Smith smile deepened again. "We've been watching you for quite a while now. The Council wanted you brought in after that accident but I told them it wasn't necessary. You were hurt pretty bad that night. In fact the skin on your leg was torn down to the bone but due to-" He coughed into his hand. "certain 'circumstances' it was healed by the time you made it home that night. Any normal person would have been in shock if not dead almost immediately after the crash but you-" He smiled again. "You rode it out."

He began to chuckle at his own joke while Natsuki sat in shock. How the hell did he know so much? Why was she healing faster than normal? **Was **she healing faster?

"Still don't believe me?" Smith said looking at her questioningly. Reaching in his pocket he pulled out a silver object. Pressing down on a button something snapped out of the side of it. "I could demonstrate it if you wish." Light glinted off the now revealed blade. He wore a sickening smile.

Natsuki was glaring again. "I'd like to see you try." Pulling at the handcuffs with all her might in a poor effort to demonstrate her strength.

Smith's expression changed to one of disappointment as he began to look at the blade turning it from side to side. "Oh… I guess I won't be able too." Looking back at her over the edge of the blade his sickening smile returned again. "Maybe I should test it out on Fujino-san?"

Before Natsuki knew what she was doing she launched herself at him. There was the loud sound of metal scraping against tile. "Don't you dare fucking touch her."

Smith looked at her wide eyed for a minute before he began laughing loudly. Natsuki didn't have a clue what was so funny. _If it weren't for these damn hand cuffs I'd fucking kill him._

"Oh that's- that's great." Smith said clapping his knee finally catching his breath. "I assure you Kuga-san I have no intention of hurting Fujino-san. Quite the contrary in fact." Closing the knife and returning it to his pocket he smiled back at her. "You are progressing faster than anyone expected. Well anyone besides me of course."

Still fighting to reach him Natsuki began to growl again. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Lifting his had he pointed towards her. "That."

Following the line of his finger she looked down at her wrists. Her mouth fell open as she saw he was pointing at.

The steel side bars of the hospital bed were bent where she had pulled at her handcuffs when she tried to strangle the man across from her. That wasn't all, the part of the handcuffs that were attached to the sidebars were bent to where the sides were touching, and the chains seemed to be pulled to there limit.

"That's not all." Smith said with a smile. "Look behind you."

Looking behind her she saw that the wall that the bed had been against was now a considerable distance away. Quickly turning back to Smith she saw that he was indeed a few feet closer. Somehow she had managed to pull the bed across the room.

"The- There's no way." She stuttered.

"Of course there is." Smith said as she stood and began to walk towards her. Stopping a safe distance from the side of her bed he looked down at her. "Your Hime powers have returned to you."

Natsuki stared back at him. Turning her head down to her hands she began to shake. _There's no way. There is just no possible way. How? How?_ Cradling her head in her hands, her trembling increased. _That was over. That- that nightmare was over. It __**CAN'T**__ be true!_

"Or rather…" Pulled from her thoughts by his voice, she quickly looked up at him, desperate to be told that it was a lie. "They never left you."

Natsuki felt all her strength leave her body. Her face paled and she slumped back into the bed. _How? After all we went through it- it's still going on._

Not looking at him she spoke to no one, still hoping to be told it was a lie. "But- but we destroyed the star. The festival was over. I-….. We died." Closing her eyes she fought the memory of her and Shizuru vanishing into nothingness. After a few moments she stopped fighting it, finding some strange peace in the thought of fading away, into nothingness. _The pain would end then. She would finally be able to be happy too._

"Oh yes the star." She was immediately pulled from her thoughts again by Smith. Opening her eyes she saw him returning to his chair across from her. "Well, yes during the Carnival we believed it was the cause of your powers. However, later we learned that it was merely a conduit."

Standing quickly as if he forgot something he made his way over to the door and opened it. "Hey, could you bring me some hot chocolate? It seems that I will be here for a while." He said to someone out in the hall.

"Ye- yes sir." Came a timid reply.

Closing the door and returning to his seat he looked over at her once again. She was in complete shock. _They said that if we destroyed the star it would be all over. They- All the sacrifices we made. All that we did. How- How could it be a lie? __**WHY!?**_ She wanted to scream, wanted to yell at the sky and demand an explanation. _How could we go through all that and for- NOTHING!_

The sound of Smith clearing his throat pulled her from her thoughts. "Ah yes. As I was saying the star was merely a conduit for your powers. It is indeed true that you gained your powers from it so to speak, all it really did was activate and awaken within you powers you already had. After that you know the story with all the Orphans and children. You will not be able to summon your child any longer, that was something that the star did do for you as well as the presence of Orphans. So in a sense yes, that power is gone."

Natsuki was speechless. There were so many questions she wanted to ask but she found herself unable to voice them. _So we always had the power? How can this be_? She sat in thought for several minutes while Smith waited patiently.

During this time his hot chocolate arrived, brought in by a scared looking young man. Smith accepted the steaming cup and sat back in his chair looking quite content with himself.

_Wait, if I am like this… Then!_ "What about the others? Hav- Have they-"

"No. It seems that only you have retained your power." Inhaling the smell of his drink Smith took a short sip. "Ah, to hot." Setting it down he returned his attention to her. "We still don't know why that is, but only you seem to have kept them. Perhaps it has something to do with your mother?" Turning his head quizzically to the side he gave off the appearance of a hawk studying its prey.

"To answer your earlier question this is why you were attacked. We believe that someone was attempting to capture you in order to gain the secret to this power. That or kill you to wipe it out." Smith shrugged. "In a way you were lucky we were watching you, otherwise you might have become a Ginny pig to some sick scientist."

Natsuki's anger broke through her shock as she spoke, "How's this any different from what you are doing to me?"

Smith sighed and shook his head. "You have so little faith in me. Sears, at least the part that concerns you is under different management and so our ideals and goals have changed. Instead of keeping you unconscious and under constant observation, I'm going to let you go."

Not for the first time Natsuki's jaw fell open. "Wh- What!?"

"Yes. However, you will be moved to a safe house for a short while until we have more information about those who are after you." Picking up his cup again he took another sip and smiled. "Ah, just right." Returning the cup to its place on the table he returned his gaze to her. "Unless you would like to remain unconscious?"

Natsuki merely glared at him. Smith, unfazed countered it with a smile. "I thought not." Letting out a great deal of air he stretched and folded his hands behind his head. "So instead of being unconscious and under constant observation, you just get to be under constant observation. How lucky for you."

Natsuki was about to tell him exactly what she thought of the current situation when she was cut off by the sound of a ringing cell phone. Smith frowned; pulling a cell phone out of his pocket he read the screen before standing. "Well, it looks like we are going to have to cut this conversation short unfortunately." He began to stretch out his back and shoulders. "I'm going to give you something to help you sleep; despite your healing abilities you still need a great deal of rest." Walking towards her he pulled out a syringe from his pocket.

Natsuki flinched slightly as she watched him take the cap off and clear it off any possible air bubbles. "Now don't fight me on this, I'm actually doing you a favor. We could just shoot you with a tranq dart but I don't think you would like that very much. The hang-over is hell."

Frowning Natsuki harrumphed and turned her head to the side. She did however raise her right arm slightly. "That's a good girl." She heard Smith say.

About to tell him where he could stick his damn syringe she stopped when she felt his hand grasp her arm and the quick prick of the needle. Almost immediately she felt heavy and lethargic.

"Now, when you wake up you will be in your new apartment." She heard Smith say from somewhere far away. "There will be instructions left for you there and it will be seen too that you follow them."

Her vision now blurry Natsuki fought to remain awake. Hearing the echoing sounds of someone walking away she tried to sit up but found that she no longer had control over her body. The echoing steps stopped for a moment before a voice resounded in her head. "I don't suggest you try contacting anyone either. We wouldn't want to put them in danger now would we?"

Her eye lids began to close. Thoughts completely muddled and cloudy she tried fruitlessly to form anything coherent. Just before she blacked out she was able to call up one picture image, and one last word. _Shizuru…_

* * *

Said girl was currently tossing and turning in her bed. It had been three days since she had gotten the feeling that something had happened to Natsuki and she hadn't gotten any sleep since.

Immediately after seeing the damage to the poll she drove to every hospital in the city in search of the biker or any kind of information about an accident but found nothing. The next day she watched the news and looked through the paper for any information regarding a crash at that intersection but again found nothing.

Deciding that she had to know whether or not Natsuki was ok she forced herself to drive to the girl's apartment. When she went there she saw no sign of Natsuki's bike and was immediately worried. Sitting in her car she waited in there for several hours hoping to catch a glimpse of the younger girl as she returned home but was no so lucky.

After her long wait she went up the Natsuki's door and began to knock. Calmly at first, then frantically as it became apparent that there would be no answer. Testing the knob she discovered that it was unlocked and cautiously opened the door.

Stepping into the apartment Shizuru gasped. There was broken glass and furniture everywhere not to mention several holes in the walls. This confirming to her that Natsuki was indeed in some sort of trouble she began to frantically search the apartment calling out the girl's name.

The more she searched the apartment the more frantic she became. There were holes in every single wall, pictures broken, mirrors smashed, and furniture thrown about. Upon entering the bathroom the first thing that caught her eye was the trash can, which was overflowing with bloody bandages. "Natsuki…" she was desperate now. Looking up she saw that the bathroom mirror had to, been smashed. There was dried blood on the glass where the impact had taken place.

After searching the entire place she finally gave up. Making her way to the couch, she sat down burying her face in her hands. The tears came unbidden but she didn't bother to fight them. "Natsuki."

Falling to her side so that she was laying on the couch she immediately felt uncomfortable as something was poking her in the ribs. Sitting up and brushing hair out of her eyes she picked up the offending object. It was a picture of them.

It was one of the few pictures Shizuru had ever gotten Natsuki to smile for. Smiling sadly she hugged the broken picture frame and fell back onto the couch crying her self to sleep just like she had for the past few weeks.

A few hours later she had awoken feeling very afraid. The apartment was dark and the moon as up, casting eerie shadows through the windows. It wasn't the darkness that scared her but the feeling of being watched by hungry eyes. Quickly looking about the apartment she saw that she had left the door open to the outside.

Still clutching the picture she made her way to the door and hesitantly looked outside. Seeing no one she sighed and leaned against the door frame. The eyes were still upon her, and they meant her no good will.

Normally she would have stayed in Natsuki's apartment to wait for her but she felt that if she stayed she would merely endanger her.

Terror driving her she glanced about outside again and seeing no one ran directly to her car. Jumping in the driver she turned it on and immediately sped away. Looking in her rearview mirror she saw a man leaning against the side of the building in the shadows watching her.

Shizuru sat up in her bed. Pulling her knees to her chest she tried to think. The first time she had had the feeling of being watched was when she was at the intersection, but she had been too caught up in her worry for Natsuki to really give it much mind at the time. Then at Natsuki's apartment. Ever since then when she went out, she felt those same eyes on her.

She knew it was the man from the apartment. Even though she had only seen him that one time she knew it was he who was following her. _But why? Is he a detective? Does he think I have something to do with Natsuki?_

No. The feeling she got when she felt she was being watched was too sinister for that. It filled her with fear and dread every time she felt those eyes on her.

Suddenly a thought struck her. _Maybe he had something to do with-_

Her thoughts were cut off by a faint sound. Holding her breath she cocked her head to the side and listened.

From down the hall where her front door was there came the sound of repeated clicks. Standing Shizuru made her way to her bedroom door. The clicking sound came again, and it was definitely coming from her front door.

Someone was trying to break in. Shizuru's eyes narrowed before they darkened. At that moment something changed within her. She didn't know what but there was definitely a change. Making up her mind she returned to her bed.

* * *

Jason Schulze grumbled to himself as he picked the lock on the door. Ten years of experience and he forgot to get a fucking copy of the god damn key. "This is fucking ridiculous."

Picking the lock on a door caused so many problems. For one it left you completely vulnerable to attack. For two it was time consuming. Three it attracted attention, and finally four it was just plain fucking annoying.

"Ha!" he whispered as he finally felt the last latch fall into place. Putting the picks back into the bag on the floor next to him he pulled out a silencer. Slowly screwing it on his pistol he slowly pushed open the door.

_Good thing they finally called, I was getting impatient._ Entering the apartment at a low crouch he scanned his surroundings. _Dumb girl is probably asleep._ He was very tempted to just walk to the bedroom but years of experience kept him from making this mistake. Instead he slowly made his way there constantly scanning the darkness around him for any sign of movement or noise.

When he finally made it to the closed bedroom door, he held his breath and slowly turned the knob. Peering into the room he saw that the target was in bed just as he thought. _So fucking predictable. Good thing they are paying a lot otherwise this would be a complete waste of time._

Slowly entering the room he stuck to the edges of it and out of the light moonlight that was pouring in through the bedroom window. Finally making it to the bed he stood and looked down at the lump.

"Sorry" he said quietly lowering the barrel of the gun down to the head of the sleeping girl. "It's nothing personal." He fired two shots, the bullets making a high pitched sound as they escaped the end of the silencer.

"Ara, that's not very nice." A voice behind him said. Quickly turning he raised his pistol and fired three shots, two where the voices heart would be and the third in the head. He gapped when he heard each round clink off something metal and three sparks light up in front of him in the darkness.

There was the sound of something flying through the air as he quickly raised his pistol again at the shadow on the opposite end of the ray of light in front of him. When he pulled the trigger he felt… nothing.

_What the…_ Looking down at his right hand that should be cradled in his left and holding his pistol he saw…nothing.

He didn't have much time to think about it as he was hit in the head by something metal that was warm and wet. Upon impact all the strength left his body and he began to sink to the ground. He heard the something that sounded like chains unwrapping as something flew across the light and wrapped around him from his neck to his feet.

Gasping for air he looked down at his body. It was a chain wrapped around him, except it appeared bladed as the sides were quite literally cutting into his skin. It started at his throat then bound his arms to his sides.

"Now, now, there is no need for that." If he had been thinking straight he would have recognized the voice as that of a female but the only thing on his mind at that moment were the links of metal slicing through his exposed skin.

"Wha- What do you want?" he gasped still suspended a few inches above the ground. He tried to see his attacker but they still stood far backing the shadows for him to even be able to make out their shape.

"Answers." Came the woman's voice as she stepped into the light.

Jason gasped again, this time not from a lack of air. "You!" It was the girl he had been sent to kill. Shizuru Fujino! Except… she was somehow different now. Her back was perfectly straight and she stood with a confidence that had been absent all the other times he had observed her. She may have been wearing an oversized t-shit and loose pants but she might as well have been wearing a kimono with all the grace she showed in merely standing.

Normally he may have found himself drawn to her but her eyes. _They are burning!_ He thought, terror spreading through his body like wildfire. And indeed they were glowing red, filled with deeply veiled anger and hatred that seemed all consuming. They drew him in and showed him all the terrors a man could ever face. He may have faced hundreds of gun and knife fights in his life time but at this moment in time he had never felt so terrified. The urge to scream and beg nearly overwhelmed hi and he very nearly gave in to the panic but he fought the urge. Barely pulling his eyes away from those burning red windows into hell he desperately searched for something else to attract his attention before they sucked him in again.

It was then that he saw the massive naginata she effortlessly cradled in her arms. It seemed to be of metal midnight blue in color. The base of the staff seemed to have become segmented into the bladed chain that was no wrapped around his body. Each of the segmented pieces had an emerald accent in the center of it that glinted in the moonlight giving him the eerie feeling that each held a snake eye that was watching him, waiting for the moment to strike. Following the metal staff up from her hands to the massive blade above her head he took in all the details hoping beyond hope to avoid her eyes again.

The blade too appeared to be made of the same midnight blue metal as the staff was, but it was accented with emerald lines running through it creating simple designs. It was then that he noticed there was blood dripping from the blade.

_What!? When did she ever cut m-_ It dawned on him in that moment. Looking down at his right arm that was now pinned to his side, his eyes scanned its length until they reached his wrist.

His arm ended there. Where he should have had a hand there was nothing. Looking down at the floor beneath him his eyes caught the glint of metal. There lying about a foot off to his right on the floor was his pistol grasped firmly by his right hand.

It was at this moment that he gave into panic and started screaming as those pitiless red eyes consumed him.

* * *

Sorry i deprived you all of rainee's omake last chapter. Here it is

Omake:

Natsuki: i think someone wants me dead...  
Shizuru: Ara...i...-faints-  
ssjx7squall: WHAT THE HELL IS WITH YOU AND ALL THE FAINTING?!AND WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM!?  
Nao: well mai and mikoto are currently ugh searching for whoever wrote that script you showed her and fujino...well is your fault  
ssjx7squall: HOW!?  
Nao: you keep making them bleed and LOOK! -points at shiznat-

Natsuki: Shizuru is your face alright?  
Shizuru: Ara, do not worry Natsuki  
Natsuki: I could lick the blood off  
Shizuru: -nosebleed- Ara...

Everyone: -sweatdrops

A/N: sorry about the dialouge in the begining, i think that is truly my weakness is dialouge. Unfortunatly i felt somethings had to be explained to everyone as well as natsuki and i couldnt see leaving it out of the story. Their conversation was actually on of the scenes i have had in my head since before i started writing so i also had to throw that in. You can tell by the time i got to shizuru i was sick of talking lol.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS RATED M FOR LANGUAGE AND VIOLENCE. That aside you have been warned, i apologize for how long it takes me to update my stories but i try. Some parts of this were inspired by a movie see if you can guess which one, and as for the violence sorry if you guys think its a bit to much. That aside plz enjoy.

Bad One: Ya sorry bout the child thing, for time reasons and creative laziness they will not be making an appearance. And as for darkside, you will really like this chapter then if you can deal with a bit of gore.

chum-sa: Well, then i hope you like this chapter. Yes she will, give it one or two more chapters on that.

EisWulf: Ha ha kinda me too but well, we wont get into that subject. In retrospect he wouldnt have had to give it to get directly like that... Sigh. Oh well hope you like this chapter too.

glowie: Well not as long as you think :) as for the next part of your review thats where the "fun" comes in.

kikyo4ever: oooh she gets answers...

pri815: BINGO Yes thats exactly why it changed, im glad someone picked up on it i was begining to think my little bit of symbolism was wasted :(

SpiderLilies2007: Ya how could you? lol

volk83: here you go :)

lindred: ya my fluff is a bit different, but im someone that thinks that the "good" moments are made that much more meaningful, powerful, and important when theres all that bad stuff backing it up. I wouldnt say he is good, more to say he is after his own ends.

uwiechan: Lol i LOVE your reviews they always make me laugh, and i will try not to deprive you as much as i have. As for the other himes i am going to open a poll some time in the next few chapters that will determine the development on that. This chapter is full of Shizuru being, well bad ass so hope you enjoy that. And last but not least i have to laugh and answer it just cus its funny, if you wanna know the answer to that last question check my profile and the college.

Silver Ice Bullet: Hee hee youll have to wait and see

WARNING THIS CHAPTER IS RATED M

Jason Schulze had finally stopped screaming

That wasn't to say that he was anywhere near calm and controlled. The monster with the burning red eyes that stood in front of him stared back at him coldly and slightly expectantly.

As the panic began to fade away it was quickly replaced by a rage that spread through his veins like wildfire. He began to hyperventilate as he fought to keep the fear that he felt even now trying to overwhelm him. How had this _girl_ trapped him like this? How had she managed to so easily predict him?

He had been to impatient he realized, to set on achieving a seemingly easy goal that he failed to even consider the possible danger's that might have laid ahead. He was furious with himself and at the situation, but he knew that that was just something he had come up with in order to fight the fear he felt when he looked into those fiery eyes.

"Now, now," she spoke. "there's no need for that, please calm down or you will pass out."

Gritting his teeth he tried to ignore the pain caused by each and every single link as he continued to breathe heavily. "Fuck you, bitch."

She cocked her head to the side in an inquisitive fashion, but her expression never changed. "I am going to ask you some questions," her voice was as cold and expressionless as her face. "And you are going to answer them."

Rage surged through him again as his heavy breathing continued. "Fuck you." He managed to grunt out before spitting defiantly at her feet.

She seemed not to have heard his curse or see his small act of supposed bravery as she continued, "Where is Natsuki?"

_What?!_ Whatever he had been expecting her to ask, this was definitely not it. Oh, he knew very well who she was talking about but why in the hell would she want to know what happened to that other girl when he had been sent here to kill _her_? _She must be insane._

"Fu-" he began to say before her movement cut him off. It was slight and barely noticeable but she flicked her wrist ever so slightly and the coils of blue and green chain that until then had laid at their feet began to move. Part of it rose into the air before lunging at him in a serpentine fashion. He gasped as he felt the cold steel wrap around his index finger and tighten down, the bladed sides slicing into his skin like scalpels.

"Now," she said as the chain continued tightening. "While I do no care what you say to me," She paused as he fought to keep his face as blank as hers but the pain was becoming too much. The sound of his finger snapping like a twig is what finally made him decide to give up all pretenses. Now showing the first emotion she had so far Fujino's eyes flashed and she showed a fury far beyond anything he had previously thought humans capable of. "On this subject, I will allow no deviation."

He let out a scream as he felt his finger slowly being severed. When the digit came loose and the chain fell slack to the floor his hyperventilating began again. "You crazy bitch!" he let out between gasps.

The anger that had filled her features just moments before was gone so quickly it may never have been there at all. "Please answer the question."

"Why the hell should I?" he growled.

"If you don't," she said as he fearfully gazed into her fiery red eyes. "I will continue…" Her upwards inflexion as she hefted the large naginata let him know exactly what she was planning on continuing.

Despite the situation he arched his eyebrow slightly. This girl was talking about torturing him as if it were nothing. Like it was as simple and mundane as breathing. Those eyes held no doubt, no fear, only promises. His anger began to falter as he felt fear overtake him once again, the acid in his stomach was beginning to rise and he suddenly felt light headed.

Those red eyes truly were gateways into hell. They pulled him in, consuming and bathing him in fire, burning his skin and mind with all the promises of what she would do to him. After all the years he had been in this profession, all the times he had faced death and torture he had never once felt so terrified. The men he had fought always had doubts, fears that could be exploited but this not so simple girl in front of him showed none. He saw no possible openings in either her physical or mental walls. In fact the deeper he attempted to look the more the fires of her eyes consumed him.

Fear was what finally drove him to answer, he had never considered himself a coward but at this point he really didn't give a damn. "Sears has her."

Her expression did not change in the slightest at knowing that probably the most powerful company in the world had the blue haired girl. "Is she alive?"

He scoffed but immediately regretted it as he saw her flick her wrist again. "No! NO!" he screamed! Blood was running down the side of his leg from his hand as he bowed his head fighting to catch his breath. "I don't know damn it! They probably killed her or turned her into some kind of lab rat."

He was tensing now flexing all his muscles in a vain attempt to fight the pain. At his words her eyes flashed for a second and the chains the entwined his body began to tighten.

"I'm sorry!" he screamed as the chains sliced through his clothes and into his skin. "If you let me go I'll help you! I'll help you find her!"

"Who do you work for?" she questioned ignoring his cries.

"Schwarz!" he wheezed, gasping for breath.

"What did you do to Natsuki?" her voice was low and demanding.

Terror filled him nearly causing him to vomit, and he would have if he could breathe. "They ordered-" he coughed as he felt some of the tension in the chains being released but not enough so that he fell to the floor. Blood was dripping from the bottom of his feet and onto the floor.

He was wheezing and coughing trying to catch his breath again while Fujino waited patiently in front of him. It was amazing how in this moment when he knew he was probably going to die that everything became so much more vivid. The pain he felt from the chain wrapped tightly around him, and the surreal way in which it kept him off the floor. The way the moonlight poured through the window and into the room, partially constricted by the blinds so that only a beam of light a few feet wide ever encroached into the dark dwelling. And finally the way Fujino stood in front of him, holding that massive archaic and yet surreal weapon, body language revealing nothing, facial features completely blank. She was truly a beautiful girl, even in her simple clothing she would have stood out in a crowd. In any other situation he would have sat back and enjoyed her beauty but at the moment he found that nearly impossible. Besides her eyes, he tried with all his might to avoid looking into them but they constantly pulled at him like a black hole, consuming every part of him.

"I am waiting." She said simply, pulling him from his thoughts.

He started shaking his head, "No, no, no, no." tears were starting to stream down his face.

"I suggest you answer Me." she said watching his pitiful display.

"No, no, no," he continued starting to plea closing his eyes in a vain attempt to block out reality.

He let out a cry as he felt a piercing pain in his left shoulder. Opening his eyes he looked down to his shoulder. The blade of Fujino's dark blue naginata was lodged in his shoulder, severing bone, tendons and muscle.

"I suggest," he looked up. Shizuru was right there in front of him, face inches from his. He could feel her breath on his face. Her proximity gave him no choice but to look into her eyes. He thought he felt terror before that was nothing compared to what he was feeling now. "That you answer me."

He felt pressure building as she started to pull the blade down, it easily cut through muscle on its slow journey towards the center of his chest. He could care less, his eyes were locked on hers and what he saw there was driving him mad.

"They ordered me to injure her, I shot her while she was driving and they picked her up." He said as if mesmerized.

She slowly withdrew the blade from his torso, intentionally prolonging his pain before returning to her spot in the moonlight. "Thank you." She said.

His vision starting to blur from loss of blood John stupidly replied, "Your welcome."

"Where can I find her?"

He began shaking his head again but quickly stopped as the world began to spin.

"Very well." She said, understanding that he didn't know.

Relief flooded him and he unconsciously sighed as he felt the chains wrapping around his body begin to loosen. "Farewell." Fujino said politely. He squinted for a moment. What? Why would she-? Then he felt the chains wrap around his body anew, tightening. And this time they weren't stopping.

* * *

"Sir we are outside Fujino's residence, it appears that the front door was picked." A man in swat gear said into his shoulder radio, crouched out side Shizuru's slightly ajar front door. Behind him were about ten men, each geared like him armed with various weapons ranging from shotguns to submachine guns. Screams could be heard coming from within.

"Well, get in there damn it, he's obviously in there." Smith said over the radio in a slightly annoyed voice. "Oh, and be careful when approaching the girl or you and your men will probably not be going home."

The crouched man sighed before looking back at his men. They were all from different parts of Japan, from various special-forces and police squads. The elite of the elite and by some form or fashion they all owed allegiance to Sears. From his understanding, he and his men were the best Sears had in this hemisphere so he couldn't really understand why in their briefing and now they were constantly being told to be weary around a mere girl.

Deciding it was pointless to puzzle over; he released the safety on his m4, raised a fist in the air, extended to fingers and signaled his men to follow him into the dark apartment.

Entering one by one they filed into the building, each going off into a different direction, covering each other's backs and checking each and every dark corner. The place appeared empty, as it was quiet except for the occasional screams resonating from a room down the hallway. Communicating through silent hand signals he let them know that they were headed towards the room. He assumed it was the girl screaming, that that sick fuck Schulze was probably having his way with her as they spoke but that was no reason to risk his life or the lives of his men.

What struck him as odd though was the tone of the screaming voice. It was nothing like that of a female but it was distinctly screaming. Now he knew John and he also knew that even under torture the man didn't crack.

Reaching the doorway he quietly spoke into his mic again. "Sir we are outside the bedroom-"

"Damn it' the flinched as Smith yelled into his ear. "Get in there before she-"

Choosing to ignore his better judgment he entered the room before Smith could finish berating him.

Entering the room he was immediately blinded as something sprayed across his helmets visor and his ears were filled with the most blood curdling scream he had ever heard in all his life.

The man behind him pushed him to the floor as per their training covering him. The sounds that followed were just as disturbing as the scream.

Over the mic he heard Smith sigh. "Too late…"

* * *

Smith sighed as he entered the apartment. _This is going to be one hell of a night._ His men were currently all over the place, looking for clues he knew they weren't going to find, securing witness and making sure this _incident_ didn't get out. Armed guards were posted at the entrance and were standing guard in the apartment as well.

Upon entering the captain of the assault team who no longer was wearing his helmet approached him saluting. "Sir."

Grudgingly sipping his hot chocolate Smith didn't bother to look up from his cup. "Don't call me sir. Now, what happened?"

"Well-" the captain hesitated.

"Oh, just show me the damn room." Smith said annoyed.

"Right this wa-" the man began to say raising his arm, but Smith was already walking down the hallway towards the bedroom. He knew the layout of the place before even Fujino did.

Pushing open the door with his mug he stopped at what lay before him. He had seen a lot of things but this one took the cake. "Well," he took another sip. "I think he's dead."

Lying near the window was a bloody pile of flesh, different sizes and body parts all piled together in a pool of blood. "So captain," Smith said as the man walked up behind him. "What happened?"

He heard the man sigh. "Well, I didn't see because the blood splattered-"

"Yeah yeah, answer the question."

"She apparently had him wrapped in some sort of bladed chain and right when we entered-"

"She cut him into pieces." Smith took another sip. "Lovely."

He walked over the bloody pile, examining it. "Looks like she cut him up a bit before she cut him up." Smith said with a slight chuckle.

"Sir if I may?" the captain said walking up to stand next to him. "I don't think she did it. I've dealt with murderers, terrorists and psychos and I don't think there is anyway that girl did this."

Smith scoffed. "Oh she did this," he crouched down and poked at the hand that was gripping a silenced PPK.

"I can't believe it…"

Smith sighed. "You have never dealt with someone like Fujino before."

"Sir?"

Standing Smith turned to look at the man. "What did she do when you entered the room?"

"Well after the uh-" he gestured to the pile, "She seemed to come out of a trance and broke down crying."

"Where is she now?"

"This way."

The captain led Smith through the apartment towards the kitchen. And there wrapped in a blanket shaking was Shizuru Fujino. "They cleaned her up and-"

"Yes, I know." Smith cut him off. _This really is going to be a long night._

A/N: Ok well if you guys think im sick for writing this chapter sorry heh, i kinda wanted to show how far shizuru would go for natsuki. I was going to make it longer too but the muse left (i wrote for 3 hours straight) so instead of cheapening what would have been im saving it for what will be. That aside i again apologize for the late update, the past week my computer was kind of out of commision, my mother bored got fried some how and Dell took their sweet time in figuring that out so thats part of it. The other part is just personal crap. Once again, hope you enjoyed the chapter and please check out the poll on my Profile, and please check out my other story Together Forever, its doing really pitiful on the review front and thats coming from someone who doesnt ask for em.

ssjx7squall


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Two updates on this story within a week of eachother, i know WOW. It seems you all liked sadistic Shizuru lol though the chapter didnt do as well review wise as i would have thought. I also find it kind of funny that you guys think that they "captured" her. To tell you the truth smith was there for Schulze. Anyways hope you enjoy this chapter.

chum-sa: hee hee extra soon for you. Yes i think shizuru would do anything within her power for Natsuki.

pri815: Hee hee glad you like my stories, your support is great. And ya i got a little freaked out writing that chapter, can you imagine going through all that? i cant.

Bad One: Ha well, i try thanx alot :) Ya i was timid on posting that chapter but it was in my mind from the BEGINNING so i couldnt leae it out. Ha im still waiting on the update for You are my angel damnit lol.

emosewame: im blushing now lol, thanx for all your great compliments :)

uwiechan: hee hee as always i love your reviews. Im glad you dont know who the bad guys are as that is kind of my intention at this point. Yes its an action romance :) and depending later on how you guys vote on a poll it will split off into one of two roads.

EisWulf: Yup Shizuru can kick some major ass. Dont fuck with a person insanely in love with someone

rainee-chan: Ha glad you liked it, and what happened to your omakes? cries

glowie: Lol i dont think shizuru would wait is why its like that. Ha you have a sharp mind, and im glad people are getting into what smith is doing, i kinda want people trying to figure out whats gonna happen, and yes its always good to see that blade :)

Hope you guys like it, Also im taking all donations on Shiznat Pics, i lost a lot of mine recenetly, all my contact info is on my profile as is my poll. Besides that please enjoy this chapter

* * *

Natsuki groaned and put her forearm over her eyes in a poor attempt to block out the offending rays of sun that poured through the open room of her new "apartment."

Slowly sitting up her world spun as all the blood rushed to her head and she wavered for a moment before quickly shutting her eyes and holding her head in her hands. "No hangover my ass."

Ever so slowly she raised her head and slowly opened her eyes again, still fighting to get used to the bright light. When they finally adjusted she saw that she was on the couch in the living room of a small apartment. A table and T.V. sat in front of her while a window that some moron had left the blinds open to was to her left. She assumed the kitchen was through the door way off to her right and that the bedroom was down the hall that way as well.

"Could put me on the bed could you?" she growled while cautiously standing. Reaching her full height and feeling no lightheadedness she began to stretch. Arms stretched out to either side and back bent she looked around the room some more. It was rather plain, with nothing all the walls and not a bit of dust anywhere it looked as if it was a hotel room rather than an apartment.

Letting out a sigh she bowed her head and let some of the fatigue that still clung to her take over for a few moments hoping to wash out the negative thoughts that were threatening to overwhelm her. Her atmosphere may have changed but all the issues that she had in her old apartment stayed with her when she was "forced" into this one.

She let out another sigh and opened her eyes before she suddenly stopped. There in front of her on the table was a small package wrapped in simple brown paper. On top of it lay a letter in a crisp white envelope.

Curiosity getting the best of her she picked up the envelope and quickly opened it. Inside she found a letter addressed to her from… John Smith. She gritted her teeth. _Damn asshole…_

It wasn't hand written but rather typed and printed, something Natsuki was grateful for.

_Dear Kuga-san,_

_If you're reading this I assume you've woken? I had my men leave the blinds open for you, after all we wouldn't want you sleeping all day and missing the job we have set up for you?_

"What!" yelled at the piece of paper as if expecting an answer.

_Calm down Ms. Kuga, it's only a cover and you will not have to spend that many hours there a day. On another note, I am sure you are quite worried about your standing in school._

_'Oh shit' _Natsuki thought. She hadn't even considered what was going to happen with her and school. With her having to go in hiding like this there was no possible way she was going to get anywhere. Falling back into the couch she let out a frustrated growl. '_I'm never going to graduate._'

Remembering that she still had the letter in her hand she held it in front of her a grim look on her face.

_We have taken care of it. In other words you will not have to worry about school this year, or for as long as you have to remain in hiding._

Letting out an exited "Ha!" Natsuki jumped up a fist in the air. Dancing around for a bit she let the happiness overwhelm her. _'Great! Now I don't have to worry about-'_ she stopped mid thought. Looking back down quickly to the letter she reread the second half of that last line.

_-for as long as you have to remain in hiding._

The joy that she felt only moments ago faded quickly as she slowly sat back down on the couch, disbelief written on her face. She had never thought that this might be a long term situation. A few weeks, a month or two at most, but it was then that she realized how naïve she had been. She should have known especially with her knowledge of companies such as First District, nothing was simple or over with quickly. Sears was essentially the same thing as First District merely American based and with a different name. There was also the question of who was after her. If a company like Sears didn't even know then that would cause so many more issues.

She growled again as she buried her head in her hands. All the possible problems that she should have known from the beginning were becoming very clear now. If Sears didn't know who was after her then that means that whoever it was, didn't want them to know. And if someone was able to hide from Sears she assumed that they must be very good at what they are doing.

She shook her head from side to side. Even **if** Sears discovered who was after her, what then? If these people could hide form Sears they may very well be capable of fighting against them as well, and with two forces like that fighting, it could very well go on forever.

Her head starting to hurt she went back to reading the letter.

_Now don't fear, I have my best men searching for the culprits._

Natsuki scoffed.

_Anyways, I'm sure you're wondering where you are._

"You're damn right I do!" she yelled at the paper.

_You are in a small town many many miles away from Fuka. You are so far in fact, that I wonder if anyone has even heard of Fuka. As you can see we have set you up in a small apartment about the size of your last one. I would really appreciate it if you would refrain from putting holes in these walls however…_

Natsuki began growling again.

_We have given you a pager it is sitting on the table next to you._

Raising her head she looked around the room until she saw the table he was talking about, and sure enough on it sat a basic looking pager.

_Now, if this pager ever goes off you are to vacate immediately. This probably means that something has happened out of my hands and you are in danger and for all in tense of purposes those after you probably know where you are._

"That's comforting…"

_You will not have access to any phones or means of communication save that which we have set up for you, and this is only so you can speak with us. It would not do well for you to try and contact anyone on the "outside" as this might endanger them as well as you. Especially your close friend._

The edge of the paper began to crumple as Natsuki tightened her grip on it.

_If for any reason we decide to contact you, you will either receive a letter or a video message from us on the television. The word that will either be written or spoken before the rest of the message will be "Green Tea."_

The edges were starting to tare.

_Other than that there is not much else to tell you. We have taken the liberty of getting you a new bike._

Her grip slackened a bit.

_Please do not destroy this one._

One corner ripped.

_Other than there is not much else to tell you, directions and times for your new job are in the envelope underneath the package I left for you, just a little something to lighten up your new home._

_Till next time,_

_Smith_

_P.S. Please destroy this letter, preferably by burning it when you're done reading it._

_'No problem there!'_ she thought as she angrily ripped the thing to shreds. The pieces slowly falling to the floor she let out a long drawn out breath before looking down at the package. What could be in it? What the hell could Smith want to give her?

Sitting there for several minutes she stared at the brown package not really wanting to open it. With how her emotions were at this point she didn't think she could handle anymore games from that sick twisted man. _Seriously did he have to fucking pick "Green Tea?"_

Sighing she reluctantly reached out and grabbed the parcel. Looking down at it in her lap for several more moments she tried to figure out what it was without opening it. Shaking it, feeling around the edges, nothing gave away what lay inside.

Finally deciding that she might as well open the damn thing she began to rip off the paper. As each piece tore it revealed a brown box that was taped shut. Sighing again she grabbed the edge of the one of the flaps and pulled, tearing all the tape as it went along.

What lay inside made her pause for a minute. With a shaking hand she reached into the box and pulled out a picture. The box fell to the floor when she realized which one it was.

In a new frame devoid of any of the blood that had soaked it a few days ago was the picture of her and Shizuru. Not bothering to fight the burning sensation in her eyes, Natsuki fell back onto the couch and cried.

* * *

Smith mentally cringed. Walking into the dark kitchen he felt like he was walking into the lions den. A man who was going to face his execution not because he must, but because he was forced to but because he had asked for it.

At the table sat a quietly sobbing Shizuru Fujino, one of the few people that Smith wouldn't be ashamed to admit inspired no small amount of fear in him. This woman had single handedly destroyed the most powerful criminal organization in this hemisphere and come out physically unscathed. It wasn't so much that she had wiped First District's existence from the face of the earth but the manner in which she did it.

He was about to do one of the most dangerous things he had ever done. He was about to come face to face with a woman that in a few moments he was sure, would want nothing more than to turn him into a pile of flesh like that poor bastard in the other room.

Taking a seat across from her Smith spoke, "Good evening Ms. Fujino, I assume introductions aren't necessary?"

The girls sobbing stopped immediately and she raised her head and Smith barely stopped himself from shivering. Those eyes were terrifying.

"Smith." She spoke his name, voice dripping with contempt.

"Yes." He said smiling slyly attempting to hide the nervousness he felt.

"Are these guards really necessary?" she said, gesturing to the two men that flanked her, automatic weapons aimed at the back of her neck.

"I suppose not," he said gesturing to the men to leave the room. "After all, I doubt they could stop you if you really wanted to kill me."

Watching the men leave with mild interest she said, "No."

It wasn't a boast, it wasn't a threat, it was merely a statement of fact. The men who were at the doorway looked back at her disbelievingly and began to laugh. _Fools._ Smith thought with a grimace. But then again, few knew the things about this girl that he did.

She turned her attention back to him, face emotionless but eyes burning holes through him. Those red orbs seemed to glow in the darkness, two burning embers hinting to the firestorm that lay behind them. "You work for Sears, correct." It wasn't so much a question as another statement.

"That is correct." Smith said interlacing his fingers in front of him on the table.

"Where is Natsuki?" she asked simply.

_Now the game begins._ "What makes you think I know where she is?" he asked, his tone and facial expressions revealing nothing.

Nothing obvious changed about the girl but suddenly she seemed to become very threatening. Smith felt a suffocating weight settle upon him and fears that were long forgotten creeping back up on him. He kept his face blank and his body language neutral though, this game was to important to lose because of a possible bluff.

"I know you have her, now tell me where she is." Her voice was still emotionless, but those eyes continued to pull him in.

_Damn,_ he mentally cursed. Just how much had Schulze divulged to her? He supposed it couldn't be helped, Smith truly doubted anyone could have put up with the interrogation that Fujino probably subjected him to. Despite that though he couldn't help but be angered by the fact that he hadn't captured the man alive.

The two were soon engulfed in silence. The ambient noises coming from the other rooms of the apartment seeming to be cut off by an invisible wall. The battle of wills had begun and for the first time in years Smith had a sneaking inclination that he might lose this one.

After a few moments of thought Smith raised his hands in front of him in a defeated gesture, a smile on his face. "Very well, it is true that we have her."

Fujino leaned forward. It was very slight but Smith caught it. His smile deepened. "She is well I assure you."

The red eyed monster in front of him seemed to relax at that, some of the tension leaving her body. That isn't to say that she was no longer dangerous.

"She is in a safe house at the moment, where I will not say." Smith said, for the first time since the conversation not in mock confidence. He had the upper hand now.

"Are you sure she is ok?" Shizuru asked.

Smith blinked. The girl in front of him had completely changed. No longer was she giving off the air of a predator about to leap and no more did her eyes burn. No, now she was back to- _Normal…_ Smith thought. Her eyes now held desperation and her body language spoke of pleading.

"I assure you, she is in the best of health."

Shizuru fell back into her chair all her energy leaving her. "Good…" was the last thing she said before slowly closing her eyes.

Smith sat there staring at the unconscious girl in disbelief. Several minutes past before he quietly called someone from the next room. The man quickly came in and stood at attention saluting.

"Sir."

Smith stood and walked to stand next to the man speaking in his ear.

"Get ready to pull out. Make sure this place is cleaned exceptionally well. I have a feeling that we will soon have a lot of company."

He started to walk out of the room leaving the man and the girl behind.

"What about the girl sir?"

Smith stopped and turned to consider the girl. "Prep her for evac, sedation won't be necessary. Make sure her trip is comfortable as well, we can't have a Fujino traveling in a steel van."

He started to leave before the man stopped him again. "Where are we to take her sir?"

"To the safe house of course." Smith said as if it was obvious. Glancing back at Fujino one last time before he left the room he then turned to the man. "And for the last time don't call me sir!"

* * *

Smith was silent as he exited the apartment, his men moving quickly to get the place ready to be cleaned. His meeting with Fujino had given him many things to think over. That and the "assassination attempt."

At this point Smith was sure that Schulze was sent to die, but that meant that his enemies knew something that he didn't and that was very unsettling. That also meant that they had inside information as well as help. He could almost feel the noose getting tired around his neck at this point.

Too many things to worry about and too little time to deal with all the problems that were bringing him closer and closer to ruin. The most pressing matter was the rats within his company. Whoever it was had to be good at what they did because Smith was usually pretty good at keeping his company clean.

Getting into the black car that was parked out in the parking lot he sighed leaning his head back against the leather seat.

"Problem sir?" Takeda asked from the front seat.

"There's a bit of a change in plans now." Smith said staring at the ceiling of the car. "Things are moving much faster than expected and certain things are changing. I need that list of possibles in the hour."

"Sir?" Takeda questioned concernedly.

"Just do it damn it." Smith snapped.

Gazing out the window to the open door way of the apartment he had been in a few minutes ago he drifted off into thought. _You've given me much to think about Fujino._

* * *

A/N: I guess this is a lil anti climactic after the last chapter but hey there are ups and downs. Hope you guys liked it, also the poll on my profile will soon be replaced by a new one so hurry and get your votes in THEY DO MAKE A DIFFERENCE. The next poll will be for you readers and you will need to vote quickly becaus it will determine what direction i take on this story.

Also, i lost a lot of my shiznat pics recently...So i am taking donations lol my contact info is on my profile as is the poll

And... anyone know where i can find these My-HiME Anime Book Volume 2, Natsukis prelude??


	15. Chapter 15

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A/N: Fair warning on this chapter, it's going to suck. I have been way to emotionatlly detached lately to write espeically about the upcoming scenes in just about all my stories. Anyways a Huge thanx to all the people who sent me pictures and gave me ways of obtaining Natsuki's Prelude. Bows To all the writers who read my story, if you want quicker and longer updates, UPDATE YOUR stories, its not reviews but other stories that help me write, the atmospheres/emotions/feelings in them really help me get into the mood to write about these two and it has been really dry lately there are so few updates :(

ellenoir: I am truly flattered and greatly pleased that you like my story. I have to apologize for this chapter however, it is going to be horirble, and thank you for the link :)

chum-sa: Hee hee it is kinda obvious after this chapter what is going to happen :) Thanx for the e-mails btw

Bad One: ha i like shizuru like that myself sometimes but a weaker shizuru isnt always a bad thing to see. And bah you really need to get back to writing, you have some of my favorite stories on hold atm :( Also thank you for all the great pics.

ShizuruKuga: love the name :P and thanx

colorfulsunrise514: We will see and thanx :)

Silver Ice Bullet: Lol shizuru being Natsuki's bodyguard... intersting lol. he ehe we will see

elfspirit: Sorry bout the late update but with anyluck the next chapter will be out later this week

pri815: Glad you liked that idea i was kind of hesitant to use it but i thought what the hell why not. Thanx for the link :)

rainee-chan: Sorry i blame my self for that on how seperated my updates are :( And your omakes are always great. Yes you do need to write too, hurry up with those updates

uwiechan: Ha ha well i think we all wish we could either be like one of these two or meet someone like them in real life. Im glad your liking smith, im workin on portraying him as an ass but kind of an endearing one, someone you love to hate. As for the other Hime's it is going to be determined very soon on whether or not they will make an appearance.

kikyo4ever: Yes it does seem that way, and its meant to :P And yes he is doing things to benifit himself. In the next few chapters i am gonna kinda diverge from the norm on how these action stories take place but so much will depend on the poll im setting up right now. Either way the poll turns out i think your going to be pleased with Natsuki

lostinafeeling: Thank you for all the great info, i finally read it and ya i loved it. btw, Lone Wolf is my name in counterstrike lol

Eiswulf: Ha ya he saved his own ass there. No they wont see Takeda but there are going to be a few developments on that area in a while.

**ABANDONMENT READERS IMPORTANT NOTICE**: I am posting a poll on my profile that you all NEED to vote on. It will determine greatly which path this story takes. I will give a brief explination at the bottom of the page.

* * *

"Damn it!" Natsuki yelled and cradled her bruised hand in the other. The annoying blaring that had woken her up continued, the high pitched pulsing sound echoed throughout the room.

Glaring down at the alarm clock Natsuki growled. For the past three days she had been woken up by the obnoxious sound and had as of yet found no way of shutting the thing off beyond letting it ring itself out. Normally she would have just thrown the damn thing against the wall or crushed it by now but whoever had set up the room for her had encased the clock in a steel case that was bolted to the table. The thing she could do was read the time as all the buttons were covered.

With how the clock kept ringing it was like it was trying to tell her something beyond just waking up but as of yet she hadn't figured out what that was. She had been spending all her time inside the past few days, partly out of laziness and partly out of just pure exhaustion.

All of her wounds, aches and pains were gone at this at this point but she found herself filled with a fatigue beyond anything she had ever felt before. She assumed it had something to do with how quickly she had healed, that or the drug Smith had given her.

"Asshole…" Natsuki said glaring at the clock as if it were the hawk faced man.

Not wanting to dwell on it anymore she sighed and slowly stood, stretching. She was up; she might as well stay up. Walking past the nightstand she ignored the picture and the screeching alarm clock sitting on it. Making her way through the living room towards the kitchen she vaguely noted that the T.V. turned on just as she entered the kitchen.

She stopped for a second tilting her head to the side. _How the hell did it turn on?_

"Hello?" Natsuki nearly jumped out of her skin when he heard a male voice coming from the room behind her.

Eyes wide she poked her head around the corner into the room and saw that it was empty. _What the-_

"Green tea?" came the male voice again.

_Green tea? What th- OH!_ Suddenly remembering something Natsuki ran into the room to sit in front of the T.V.

On the screen was a bored looking Smith leaning back in a chair twirling a pencil in his hand. Noticing that she had finally realized what was going on he stopped and leaned forward in his chair smiling. "I see you've finally woken up."

Natsuki scoffed. "As if I couldn't with that damn clock in there." Gesturing back to the bedroom where the clock was still blaring she glared at the blond haired man.

Smith chuckled. "Didn't you ever think that it was trying to tell you something?" He brought out a panel that had a few buttons on it and pressed one. The clock immediately stopped ringing.

"You…" Natsuki began growling.

Smith began laughing out loud now. "After finding the remnants of quite a few alarm clocks in your old apartment I thought a few alterations to the one we've provided you would be prudent."

"You can shove it up your-"

"Furthermore…" Smith leaned back in his chair once again. "We didn't give you this apartment so you could continue your sedentary lifestyle. It's time to stop moping and do something."

"You can go to hell." Natsuki growled feeling the anger beginning to rise. "You're the one who sent that damn-"

"In order to give you a reminder of what you have to go back to once this mess is over." Smith explained, for once a serious look on his face as he looked directly at Natsuki through the screen.

"For someone who seems to know so much about me you don't know shit! Shizuru wants nothing to do with me" Natsuki growled.

"Oh I beg to differ." Smith said nonchalantly. "Your friend is quite actively searching you out and was very distressed last time I heard."

About to tell the man what she thought of him again Natsuki stopped her mouth hanging open slightly. _She- She's looking for me? Why? After what she said to me last time._

She smirked. "She probably doesn't even know I'm gone."

"On the contrary," Smith said while examining his fingernails. "She knew the moment you got into trouble. Sharp girl that Fujino."

Natsuki's smug look fell from her face immediately. _She knows. Then sh-_

"On another matter," Smith said cutting her depressive train of thought. "You should be going to work. That's why your alarm doesn't shut off, because you haven't left the house in three days. You know where to go, you have transportation what seems to be the problem?"

"I don't need to be lectured by you." Natsuki grunted.

"Oh really?" Smith raised an eyebrow. "After I saved your life? After I took care of your issues with school? Oh lets not forget the wonderful apartment I set you up with."

"None of which I asked for." She growled.

"True you didn't," The blond man began rocking in his chair. "But I am sure there are those that would rather see you alive than dead. Especially your good friend."

"You leave her out of this!" Natsuki yelled. Her anger flared once again but the man had struck a chord. "Fine!" crossing her arms and turning her head to the side she fought back all the dark emotions and thoughts that were beginning to fill her.

"Very good." Smith picked something from beneath his nail and began examining it. "Now you should probably be getting to work, there is still time and your bike is waiting for you outside."

Natsuki gave an affirmative grunt.

"Oh and before I forget," he leaned forward enterlacing his fingers in front of him as he smiled at Natsuki. "You should probably clean up the place it is absolutely filthy."

Scoffing Natsuki ignored all the trash that littered the floor of the room.

"There are cleaning supplies in the closet in the hallway. From what I know of her I think your roommate who will be arriving in a few days likes tidiness."

Natsuki scoffed again before everything he said sank in. She whipped her head back to the screen. "Who-" she began but the T.V. turned off, leaving behind the dark burned in outline of Smith.

Growling she through the pillow next to her at the T.V. crying out in frustration. "Damn it!"

With that she got up and began to get ready for work. In an extremely foul mood and with so much on her mind she doubted that today was going to be anywhere near to a good one.

Making her way outside of the apartment she stopped and stared. Eye brow beginning to twitch she growled. There in front of her chained to a fence was Shwinn bicycle the exact same color of her old Ducati.

* * *

**ABANDONMENT IMPORTANT NOTICE: **Ok it will either be a long version or short version. The long version will contain a butload of action fighting yadiyadaiya and will bring in other Himes, the downside Shizuru and Natsuki will be separated for sometime, possibly longer than they have been now but they will get together. Short version will contain fighting still but to a lesser degree, less development, less characters but a shorter time for a Shizuru Natsuki reunion. Another downside to the short version, the ending will be... eh less than adequate. Ok 37 people have this story alerted and i get about 300 veiws per chapter, if i could get 50-100 responses on this poll that would be great guys my last poll was kinda sad on how many voted. Anyways thanx for reading, the important notice is over but another will be below this one.

As of today apparently, Kara Papas has pretty much cancled all her stories. This is truly sad as she is an amazing author and all her stories are downright fantastic and sadly all still ongoing. While i am sure it is not her main reason for stopping one of her major points is lacking of reviews. This is not me fishing for reviews but merely reminding readers that many authors on this site thrive on them and they push them to write more. I fully understand being to lazy to review sometimes and am guilty of putting it off and never doing it but please review. With how few updates there are on stories now adays (1 a day if we are lucky when i used to get like 5) it is more crucial now than ever to review your favorite authors and give them CONSTRUCTIVE critism and cheer them on. I unfortunatly came into the Hime/Otome fanfic community late (bangs head on wall) but i really dont wanna have to deal with it dying any time soon as it is full of great authors and great stories. So please review your favorite authors, write if you have ideas can keep this place going :)

ssjx7squall

Almost Forgot Rainee-chans omake!

Smith -pokes shizuru with a stick- wow she really fainted? -keeps poking-  
Shizuru: z...-eyes twitched- poke -eyes twitches more- po-  
Smith: AH! LEAVE MY ARM ALONE YOU BEAST! -running around with shizuru bitting smith's arm-  
Natsuki: OH GOSH! SHIZURU! BAD BAD SHIZURU! YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO ONLY BITE ME!  
Shizuru: -blinks- -runs to natsuki-  
Everyone else: -blinks- -sweatdrops at shizuru (censored)-  
Nao: Hey! she isnt suppose to do that! she is not a cannibal!  
Smith: -sniffs- who cares? -sniffs- my little arm -sniffs-  
Squall: god...im around too many crazy ppl 


End file.
